Mark Twain Quotes, Kindness Quotes, Humorous Quotes

The humorous writer professes to awaken and direct your love, your pity, your kindness--your scorn for untruth, pretension, imposture....He takes upon himself to be the week-day preacher.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Kindness Quotes , Humorous Quotes

We don't cut up when mad men are bred by the old legitimate regular stock religions, but we can't allow wildcat religions to indulge in such disastrous experiments.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Cutting Quotes , Men Quotes

Each man is afraid of his neighbor's disapproval - a thing which, to the general run of the human race, is more dreaded than wolves and death.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Death Quotes , Running Quotes

New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

By common consent of all the nations and all the ages the most valuable thing in this world is the homage of men, whether deserved or undeserved.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Age Quotes

Few things are more irritating than when someone who is wrong is also very effective in making his point.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Ignorance Quotes

Until I came to New Mexico, I never realized how much beauty water adds to a river.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Rivers Quotes , Water Quotes

How superbly brave is the Englishman in the presence of the awfulest forms of danger and death; and how abject in the presence of any and all forms of hereditary rank.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Brave Quotes , Danger Quotes

[The Bible is] a mass of fables and traditions, mere mythology.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religion Quotes , Fables Quotes

Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer. All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Clean Desk Quotes

There are people who strictly deprive themselves of each and every eatable, drinkable, and smokable which has in any way acquired a shady reputation. They pay this price for health. And health is all they get for it. How strange it is. It is like paying out your whole fortune for a cow that has gone dry.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Food Quotes , People Quotes

...one of the first achievements of the legislature was to institute a ten-thousand-dollar agricultural fair to show off forty dollars' worth of pumpkins in - however, the Territorial legislature was usually spoken of as the "asylum".

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Achievement Quotes , Firsts Quotes

One thing at a time, is my motto - and just play that thing for all it is worth, even if it's only tto pair and a jack.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Determination Quotes

Germany, the diseased world's bathhouse.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Germany Quotes

Don't part with your illusions. When they are gone, you may still exist, but you have ceased to live.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Life Quotes

Jim said that bees won't sting idiots, but I didn't believe that, because I tried them lots of times myself and they wouldn't sting me.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Literature Quotes

It is a wise child that knows its own father, and an unusual one that unreservedly approves of him.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Wise Quotes

I do not wish any reward but to know I have done the right thing.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wish Quotes , Done Quotes

The man who doesn't read good books has no advantage over the man who can't read them. It is said that leaders are readers. However if they read trashy magazines for the majority of their time and they never run with the information that they glean from resourceful books, then they may as well have not taken any time to read at all. It is easier to stay out than get out.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Running Quotes , Inspirational Life Quotes

France has usually been governed by prostitutes

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Mark Twain Quotes