Mark Twain Quotes

We regret the things we don't do more than the things we do.

6 years ago

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My father and I were always on the most distant terms when I was a boy--a sort of armed neutrality, so to speak. At irregular intervals this neutrality was broken, and suffering ensued; but I will be candid enough to say that the breaking and the suffering were always divided up with strict impartiality between us--which is to say, my father did the breaking, and I did the suffering.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Father Quotes , Boys Quotes

Thanksgiving Day - Let all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks, now, but the turkeys. In the island of Fiji they do not use turkeys, they use plumbers. It does not become you and me to sneer at Fiji.

6 years ago

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Travel is fatal to bigotry.

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No one can write perfect English and keep it up through a stretch of ten chapters. It has never been done.

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Whenever a copyright law is to be made or altered, then the idiots assemble.

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How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand.

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To avoid being drawn into error, keep a firm grip on the truth.

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I know all those people. I have friendly, social, and criminal relations with the whole lot of them.

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If to be interesting is to be uncommonplace, it is becoming a question, with me, if there are any commonplace people

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Loyalty to the country always. Loyalty to the government when it deserves it.

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To stand still is to fall behind.

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Between believing a thing and thinking you KNOW is only a small step and quickly taken.

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I shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes.

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The church is always trying to get other people to reform, it might not be a bad idea to reform itself a little, by way of example

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Everything has its limit - iron ore cannot be educated into gold.

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Sagebrush is a very fair fuel, but as a vegetable it is a distinguished failure. Nothing can abide the taste of it but the jackass and his illegitimate child the mule.

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Get a bicycle. You will not regret it, if you live.

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The older we grow the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without bursting one's clothes.

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He wa'n't no common dog, he wa'n't no mongrel; he was a composite. A composite dog is a dog that is made up of all the valuable qualities that's in the dog breed-kind of a syndicate; and a mongrel is made up of all riffraff that's left over.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dog Quotes , Quality Quotes