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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- A banquet is probably the most fatiguing thing in the world except ditchdigging. It is the insanest of all recreations. The inventor of it overlooked no detail that could furnish weariness, distress, harassment, and acute and long-sustained misery of mind and body.
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- Those who say truth is stranger than fiction have wasted their time on poorly written fiction.
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- I was dead for millions of years before I was born and it never inconvenienced me a bit.
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- Seventy is old enough. After that there is too much risk.
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- Whose property is my body? Probably mine. I so regard it. If I experiment with it, who must be answerable? I, not the State. If I choose injudiciously, does the state die? Oh, no.
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- No man that has ever lived has done a thing to please God--primarily. It was done to please himself, then God next.
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- Modesty antedates clothes and will be resumed when clothes are no more.
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- Perhaps it will be simplest to throw away the tags and generalize India with one all-comprehensive name, as the Land of Wonders.
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- When some men discharge an obligation, you can hear the report for miles around.
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- It's a good thing for a dog to have fleas; keeps his mind off being a dog.
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- Thanksgiving Day - Let all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks, now, but the turkeys. In the island of Fiji they do not use turkeys, they use plumbers. It does not become you and me to sneer at Fiji.
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- No man has an appreciation so various that his judgment is good upon all varieties of literary work.
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- Books are for people who wish they were somewhere else.
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- All gods are better than their reputation.
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- I have learned that human existence is essentially tragic. It is only the love of God, disclosed and enacted in Christ, that redeems the human tragedy and makes it tolerable. No, more than tolerable. Wonderful.
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- If men bore children, there would only be one born in each family.
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- Good fathers not only tell us how to live, they show us.
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- In God We Trust. It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased; it always sounds well - In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.
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- More than once I have been humiliated by my resemblance to God the father; He is always longing for the love of His children and trying to get it on the cheapest and laziest terms He can invent.
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- All religions issue bibles again Satan, and say the most injurious things against him, but we never hear his side.
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