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  • Mark Twain Quotes   2407
  • There warn't anybody at the church, except maybe a hog or two, for there warn't any lock on the door, and hogs likes a puncheon floor in summer-time because it's cool. If you notice, most folks don't go to church only when they've got to; but a hog is different.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Summer Quotes , Doors Quotes
  • By law of periodical repetition, everything which has happened once must happen again and again -- and not capriciously, but at regular periods, and each thing in its own period, not another's and each obeying its own law.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Law Quotes , History Quotes
  • If the bubble reputation can be obtained only at the cannon's mouth, I am willing to go there for it, provided the cannon is empty. If it is loaded my immortal and inflexible purpose is to get over the fence and go home. My invariable practice in war has been to bring out of every fight two-thirds more men than when I went in. This seems to me Napoleonic in its grandeur.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , War Quotes , Home Quotes
  • In our day we don't allow a hundred and thirty years to elapse between glimpses of a marvel. If somebody should discover a creek in the county next to the one that the North Pole is in, Europe and America would start fifteen costly expeditions thither; one to explore the creek, and the other fourteen to hunt for each other.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Europe And America Quotes , Discovery Quotes
  • The vast majority of the race whether savage or civilized, are secretly kind at heart and shrink from inflicting pain, but in the presence of the aggressive and pitiless minority they don't dare to assert themselves.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pain Quotes , Heart Quotes
  • That is a society editor, sitting there elegantly dressed, with his legs crossed in that indolent way, observing the clothes the ladies wear, so that he can describe them for his paper and make them out finer than they are and get bribes for it and become wealthy.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Editors Quotes , Clothes Quotes
  • As to the human race. There are many pretty and winning things about the human race. It is perhaps the poorest of all the inventions of all the gods but it has never suspected it once. There is nothing prettier than its naive and complacent appreciation of itself. It comes out frankly and proclaims without bashfulness or any sign of a blush that it is the noblest work of God. It has had a billion opportunities to know better, but all signs fail with this ass. I could say harsh things about it but I cannot bring myself to do it-it is like hitting a child.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Appreciation Quotes , Children Quotes