Mark Twain Quotes, Theatre Quotes, Stories Quotes

I like a good story well told. That is the reason I am sometimes forced to tell them myself.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Theatre Quotes , Stories Quotes

Every man has a secret ambition: To outsmart horses, fish and women.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Horse Quotes , Women Quotes

A healthy and wholesome cheerfulness is not necessarily impossible to any occupation.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Healthy Quotes , Occupation Quotes

Worrying is like paying a debt you don't owe.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Knighterrantry is a most chuckleheaded trade, and it is tedious hard work, too, but I begin to see that there is money in it, after all, if you have luck. Not that I would ever engage in it, as a business, for I wouldn't. No sound and legitimate business can be established on a basis of speculation. A successful whirl in the knighterrantry line--now what is it when you blow away the nonsense and come down to the cold facts? It's just a corner in pork, that's all.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hard Work Quotes , Successful Quotes

Who would find out that I am a natural fool if I kept always cool and never let nature come to the surface? Nobody.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fool Quotes , Natural Quotes

If you don't know how to pronounce a word, say it loudly. Do not compound mispronunciation with inaudibility

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Compounds Quotes , Knows Quotes

Of the demonstrably wise there are but two: those who commit suicide, & those who keep their reasoning faculties atrophied with drink.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wise Quotes , Suicide Quotes

A jay hasnt got any more principle than a Congressman. A jay will lie, a jay will steal, a jay will deceive, a jay will betray; and four times out of five, a jay will go back on his solemnest promise.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lying Quotes , Promise Quotes

There are two things nobody should ever have to watch being made, sausage and laws.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Law Quotes , Two Quotes

My sister...was an interested and zealous invalid during sixty-five years, tried all the new diseases as fast as they came out, and always enjoyed the newest one more than any that went before; my brother had accumulated forty-two brands of Christianity before he was called away.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Brother Quotes , Years Quotes

Obscurity and a competence—that is the life that is best worth living.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Happiness Quotes

What a lie it is to call this a free country, where none but the unworthy and undeserving may swear.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Country Quotes , Lying Quotes

Education consists mainly of what we have unlearned.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Education Quotes

A human being has a natural desire to have more of a good thing than he needs.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happiness Quotes , Food Quotes

No one is sane, straight along, year in and year out, and we all know it. Our insanities are of varying sorts, and express themselves in varying forms-fortunately harmless forms as a rule.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Years Quotes , Insanity Quotes

I've had a lot of worries in my life, most of which never happened.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Life Quotes

A sincere compliment is always grateful to a lady, so long as you don't try to knock her down with it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Grateful Quotes , Long Quotes

Do one thing every day you don't want to do.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Want Quotes

There is not a single celebrated Southern name in any of the departments of human industry except those of war, assassination, lynching, murder, the duel, repudiation, & massacre.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , War Quotes , Lynching Quotes