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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- I was born modest; not all over, but in spots.
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- Don't use a five-dollar word when a fifty-cent word will do.
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- I'm a very old man. I've had lots of problems. Most of them never happened..!
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- To write without pay until somebody offers pay. If nobody offers pay within three years, the candidate may look upon this circumstance with the most implicit confidence as the sign that sawing wood is what he was intended for.
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- God made the Idiot for practice, and then He made the School Board.
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- History may not repeat, but it often rhymes.
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- Cold! If the thermometer had been an inch longer we'd all have frozen to death!
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- There are those who scoff at the schoolboy, calling him frivolous and shallow: Yet it was the schoolboy who said 'Faith is believing what you know ain't so'.
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- No sane man can be happy, for to him life is real, and he sees what a fearful thing it is.
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- Now I can only pray that there may be a God -- and a heaven -- or something better.
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- If you're looking for friends when you need them...it's too late.
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- Each man is afraid of his neighbor's disapproval - a thing which, to the general run of the human race, is more dreaded than wolves and death.
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- I don't want my girl to be so skinny she can knife me with her knee.
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- The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad.
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- Be respectful to your superiors, if you have any.
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- Take your mind out every now and then and dance on it. It is getting all caked up.
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- Conscience, man's moral medicine chest.
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- It's easy to make friends, but hard to get rid of them.
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- You must not pay a person a compliment, and then straightway follow it with a criticism.
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- I don't believe there is anything in the whole earth that you can't learn in Berlin except the German language.
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