Mark Twain Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Funny Quotes

Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Don't wake up a woman in love. Let her dream, so that she does not weep when she returns to her bitter reality

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Marriage Quotes

Delicacy - a sad, sad false delicacy - robs literature of the two best things among its belongings: Family-circle narratives & obscene stories.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Circles Quotes , Two Quotes

Always tell the truth; then you don't have to remember anything

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Honesty Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

But they (the infantry) had no use for boys of twelve and thirteen, and before I had a chance in another war, the desire to kill people to whom I had not been introduced had passed away.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , War Quotes , Boys Quotes

Never put off until tomorrow what you can avoid altogether. A clean desk is a sign of a cluttered desk drawer. All you need in this life is ignorance and confidence, and then success is sure.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Clean Desk Quotes

I don't give a damn for a man that can only spell a word one way.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Beer Quotes

Where a blood relation sobs, an intimate friend should choke up, a distant acquaintance should sigh, a stranger should merely fumble sympathetically with his handkerchief.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Blood Quotes , Stranger Quotes

What is Man? Man is a noisome bacillus whom Our Heavenly Father created because he was disappointed in the monkey.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Father Quotes , Men Quotes

Always obey your parents. When they are present. This is the best policy in the long run. Because if you don't, they will make you. Most parents think they know better than you do, and you can generally make more by humoring that superstition than you can by acting on your own better judgment.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Running Quotes , Thinking Quotes

Is the human race a joke? Was it devised and patched together in a dull time when there was nothing important to do?

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Race Quotes , Important Quotes

Life does not consist mainly - or even largely - of facts and happenings.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Doe Quotes , Facts Quotes

The community is eminently Portuguese - that is to say, it is slow, poor, shiftless, sleepy, and lazy.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Community Quotes , Lazy Quotes

Biographies are but the clothes and buttons of the man. The biography of the man himself cannot be written.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fashion Quotes , Inspiration Quotes

If the desire to kill and the opportunity to kill always came together, who would escape hanging? Framed in a more positive light, this tells us also that if we wish to accomplish a particular thing then we need to increase our level of desire for that thing and to create or seek out the opportunities and right environment for it to happen without fail.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Life Quotes , Opportunity Quotes

The xmas holidays have this high value: that they remind Forgetters of the Forgotten, & repair damaged relationships.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Xmas Quotes , Holiday Quotes

Writing is the easiest thing in the world.... Just try it sometime. I sit up with a pipe in my mouth and a board on my knees and I scribble away.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Trying Quotes

Our Congresses consist of Christians. In their private life they are true to every obligation of honor; yet in every session they violate them all, and do it without shame. Because honor to party is above honor to themselves.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Christian Quotes , Religious Quotes

No one can tell me what is a good cigar--for me. I am the only judge... There are no standards--no real standards. Each man's preference is the only standard for him, the only one which he can accept, the only one which can command him.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Real Quotes , Men Quotes

In God We Trust. It is the choicest compliment that has ever been paid us, and the most gratifying to our feelings. It is simple, direct, gracefully phrased; it always sounds well - In God We Trust. I don't believe it would sound any better if it were true.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Simple Quotes