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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- It is my custom to keep on talking until I get the audience cowed.
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- God's great cosmic joke on the human race was requiring that men and women live together in marriage
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- Of course, no man is entirely in his right mind at any time.
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- The person who has no opinion will seldom be wrong.
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- Such is professional jealousy; a scientist will never show any kindness for a theory which he did not start himself.
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- There are only two types of speakers in the world. 1. The nervous and 2. Liars.
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- There are lies, damned lies and statistics.
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- A joke, even if it be a lame one, is nowhere so keenly relished or quickly applauded as in a murder trial.
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- A man's first duty is to his own conscience and honor; the party and country come second to that, and never first.
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- I am pushing sixty. That is enough exercise for me.
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- The Church has opposed every innovation and discovery from the day of Galileo down to our own time, when the use of anesthetics in childbirth was regarded as a sin because it avoided the biblical curse pronounced against Eve.
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- Every time I reform in one direction I go overboard in another.
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- Courage is not the absence of fear, but the mastery of it.
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- More than once I had seen a noble who had gotten his enemy at a disadvantage stop to pray before cutting his throat.
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- Men think they think upon the great political questions, and they do; but they think with their party, not independently; they read its literature, but not that of the other side
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- You cannot have all chiefs; you gotta have Indians too. Perfect love cannot be without equality. A friend to everybody and to nobody is the same thing. We are all alike, on the inside.
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- When politics enter into municipal government, nothing resulting therefrom in the way of crimes and infamies is then incredible. It actually enables one to accept and believe the impossible.
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- I admire him, I frankly confess it; and when his time is come I shall buy a piece of the rope for a keepsake.
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- When red-headed people are above a certain social grade their hair is auburn.
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- There is nothing in the world like a persuasive speech to fuddle the mental apparatus and upset the convictions and debauch the emotions of an audience not practiced in the tricks and delusions of oratory
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