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  • Mark Twain Quotes   2407
  • All publishers are Columbuses. The successful author is their America. The reflection that they-like Columbus-didn't discover what they expected to discover, and didn't discover what they started out to discover, doesn't trouble them. All they remember is that they discovered America; they forget that they started out to discover some patch or corner of India.
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Successful Quotes , Reflection Quotes
  • It makes one hope and believe that a day will come when, in the eye of the law, literary property will be as sacred as whiskey, or any other of the necessaries of life. It grieves me to think how far more profound and reverent a respect the law would have for literature if a body could only get drunk on it.
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Reading Quotes
  • It is the will of God that we must have critics, and missionaries, and Congressmen, and humorists, and we must bear the burden. Meantime, I seem to have been drifting into criticism myself. But that is nothing. At the worst, criticism is nothing more than a crime, and I am not unused to that.
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Criticism Quotes , Bears Quotes
  • I came in with Halley's Comet in 1835. It is coming again next year, and I expect to go out with it. It will be the greatest disappointment of my life if I don't go out with Halley's Comet. The Almighty has said, no doubt: "Now here are these two unaccountable freaks; they came in together, they must go out together.
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Disappointment Quotes , Years Quotes
  • Every civilization carries the seeds of its own destruction, and the same cycle shows in them all. The Republic is born, flourishes, decays into plutocracy, and is captured by the shoemaker whom the mercenaries and millionaires make into a king. The people invent their oppressors, and the oppressors serve the function for which they are invented.
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Kings Quotes , Civilization Quotes
  • It is the Creator´s Grand Army, and he is the Commander-in-Chief... With these facts before you, now try to guess man´s chiefest pet name for this ferocious Commander-in-Chief? I will save you the trouble but you must not laugh. It is Our Father in Heaven.
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Father Quotes , Army Quotes
  • Protestant parents still keep a Bible handy in the house, so that the children can study it, and one of the first things the little boys and girls learn is to be righteous and holy and not piss against the wall. They study those passages more than they study any others, except those which incite to masturbation. Those they hunt out and study in private.
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Bible Quotes , Girl Quotes
  • I cherish the dreams of yesterday and dare not dwell on the err's of my past whose fate has been long decided, and effect I can not change. For the dreams of yesterday are the challenges of today, and the hope for tomorrow.
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dream Quotes , Fate Quotes
  • There is no God, no universe, no human race, no earthly life, no heaven, no hell. It is all a dream, a grotesque and foolish dream. Nothing exists but you. And you are but a thought -a vagrant thought, a useless thought, a homeless thought, wandering forlorn among the empty eternities!
    • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dream Quotes , Lonely Quotes