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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- Think twice before you speak to a friend in need
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Friendship Quotes , Thinking Quotes
- OYSTER, n. A slimy, gobby shellfish which civilization gives men the hardihood to eat without removing its entrails! The shells are sometimes given to the poor.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Food Quotes , Men Quotes
- IMPENITENCE, n. A state of mind intermediate in point of time between sin and punishment.
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- Loquacity, n. A disorder which renders the sufferer unable to curb his tongue when you wish to talk.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wish Quotes , Tongue Quotes
- Don't board with the devil if you wish to be fat.
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- FOLLY, n. That "gift and faculty divine" whose creative and controlling energy inspires Man's mind, guides his actions and adorns his life.
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- Friendless. Having no favors to bestow. Destitute of fortune. Addicted to utterance of truth and common sense.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Truth Quotes , Common Sense Quotes
- There was never a genius who was not thought a fool until he disclosed himself; whereas he is a fool then only.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Genius Quotes
- INFALAPSARIAN, n. One who ventures to believe that Adam need not have sinned unless he had a mind to - in opposition to the Supralapsarians, who hold that that luckless person's fall was decreed from the beginning.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Believe Quotes , Fall Quotes
- The best kind of onion soup is the simplest kind.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Onions Quotes , Soup Quotes
- WIDOW, n. A pathetic figure that the Christian world has agreed to take humorously, although Christ's tenderness towards widows was one of the most marked features of his character.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Christian Quotes , Character Quotes
- A modern school where football is taught.
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- EFFECT, n. The second of two phenomena which always occur together in the same order. The first, called a Cause, is said to generate the other-which is no more sensible than it would be for one who has never seen a dog except in pursuit of a rabbit to declare the rabbit the cause of the dog.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Dog Quotes , Science Quotes
- CERBERUS, n. The watch-dog of Hades, whose duty it was to guard the entrance - against whom or what does not clearly appear; everybody, sooner or later, had to go there, and nobody wanted to carry off the entrance.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Dog Quotes , Doe Quotes
- MONSIGNOR- A high ecclesiastical title, of which the Founder of our religion overlooked the advantages.
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- TAIL, n. The part of an animal's spine that has transcended its natural limitations to set up an independent existence in a world of its own.
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- JOSS-STICKS- Small sticks burned by the Chinese in their pagan tomfoolery, in imitation of certain sacred rites of our holy religion.
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- Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.
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- INADMISSIBLE- Not competent to be considered. Hearsay evidence is inadmissible ... but there is no religion in the world that has any other basis than hearsay evidence.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Religion Quotes , World Quotes
- If every hypocrite in the United States were to break his leg to-day the country could be successfully invaded to-morrow by the warlike hypocrites of Canada.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Country Quotes , Hypocrite Quotes