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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- GNOSTICS, n. A sect of philosophers who tried to engineer a fusion between the early Christians and the Platonists. The former would not go into the caucus and the combination failed, greatly to the chagrin of the fusion managers.
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- resolute, adj. Obstinate in a course that we approve.
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- FICKLENESS, n. The iterated satiety of an enterprising affection.
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- True, man does not know woman. But neither does woman.
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- Respectability, n. The offspring of a liaison between a bald head and a bank account.
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- REVOLUTION, n. A bursting of the boilers which usually takes place when the safety valve of public discussion is closed.
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- Cabbage: a familiar kitchen-garden vegetable about as large and wise as a man's head.
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- BODY-SNATCHER, n. A robber of grave-worms. One who supplies the young physicians with that with which the old physicians have supplied the undertaker.
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- MONAD, n. The ultimate, indivisible unit of matter (see Molecule). The monad has body without bulk, and mind without manifestation - containing all the powers and possibilities needful to his evolution into a German philosopher . .
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- critic, n. A person who boasts himself hard to please because nobody tries to please him.
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- RADIUM, n. A mineral that gives off heat and stimulates the organ that a scientist is a fool with.
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- Empty wine bottles have a bad opinion of women.
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- RADICALISM, n. The conservatism of to-morrow injected into the affairs of to-day.
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- A book which the Mohammedans foolishly believe to have been written by divine inspiration, but which Christians know to be a wicked imposture, contradictory to the Holy Scriptures.
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- A system of pitfalls thoughtfully prepared for the feet for the self-made man, along the path by which he advances to distinction.
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- CALAMITY, n. A more than commonly plain and unmistakable reminder that the affairs of this life are not of our own ordering. Calamities are of two kinds: misfortune to ourselves, and good fortune to others.
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- REALITY, n. The dream of a mad philosopher. That which would remain in the cupel if one should assay a phantom. The nucleus of a vacuum.
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- Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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- Immigrant: An unenlightened person who thinks one country better than another.
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- Nature's fortuitous manifestation of her purposeless objectionableness.
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