Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Hatred Quotes, Sentiments Quotes

HATRED, n. A sentiment appropriate to the occasion of another's superiority.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Hatred Quotes , Sentiments Quotes

Take not God's name in vain; select a time when it will have effect.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , God Quotes

HOG, n. A bird remarkable for the catholicity of its appetite and serving to illustrate that of ours. Among the Mahometans and Jews, the hog is not in favor as an article of diet, but is respected for the delicacy and the melody of its voice. It is chiefly as a songster that the fowl is esteemed; the cage of him in full chorus has been known to draw tears from two persons at once. The scientific name of this dicky-bird is _Porcus Rockefelleri_. Mr. Rockefeller did not discover the hog, but it is considered his by right of resemblance.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Names Quotes , Two Quotes

WINE, n.Fermented grape-juice known to the Women's Christian Union as "liquor," sometimes as "rum." Wine, madam, is God's next best gift to man.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Christian Quotes , Food Quotes

The palmist looks at the wrinkles made by closing the hand and says they signify character. The philosopher reads character by what the hand most loves to close upon.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Character Quotes , Wrinkles Quotes

Electricity is the power that causes all natural phenomena not known to be caused by something else

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Home Quotes , Energy Quotes

Responsibility, n. A detachable burden easily shifted to the shoulders of God, Fate, Fortune, Luck or one's neighbor. In the days of astrology it was customary to unload it upon a star.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Stars Quotes , Responsibility Quotes

LUMINARY, One who throws light upon a subject; as an editor by not writing about it.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Writing Quotes , Light Quotes

Kindness n: A brief preface to ten volumes of exaction.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Kindness Quotes , Volume Quotes

The sum of religion, says Pythagoras, is to be like him thou worshipest. Had Pythagoras lived in our day he would have seen his mistake. The sum of modern religion is to make him thou worshipest like unto thyself.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Mistake Quotes , Modern Quotes

FORMA PAUPERIS. [Latin] In the character of a poor person - a method by which a litigant without money for lawyers is considerately permitted to lose his case.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Money Quotes , Latin Quotes

Experience - the wisdom that enables us to recognise in an undesirable old acquaintance the folly that we have already embraced.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wisdom Quotes , Experience Quotes

RESPITE, n. A suspension of hostilities against a sentenced assassin, to enable the Executive to determine whether the murder may not have been done by the prosecuting attorney. Any break in the continuity of a disagreeable expectation.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Expectations Quotes , Done Quotes

NIRVANA- In the Buddhist religion, a state of pleasurable annihilation awarded to the wise, particularly to those wise enough to understand it.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wise Quotes , Buddhist Quotes

TRICHINOSIS, n. The pig's reply to proponents of porcophagy.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Food Quotes , Pigs Quotes

Mad; adj. Affected with a high degree of intellectual independence; not conforming to standards of thought, speech, and action derived by the conformants from study of themselves; at odds with the majority; in short, unusual. It is noteworthy that persons are pronounced mad by officials destitute of evidence that they themselves are sane.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Crazy Quotes , Odds Quotes

Introduction - a social ceremony invented by the devil for the gratification of his servants and the plaguing of his enemies.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Evil Quotes , Enemy Quotes

Christian - One who follows the teachings of Christ insofar as they are not inconsistent with a life of sin.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , God Quotes

BEG, v. To ask for something with an earnestness proportioned to the belief that it will not be given.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Belief Quotes , Given Quotes

PRESIDE, v. To guide the action of a deliberative body to a desirable result. In Journalese, to perform upon a musical instrument; as, "He presided at the piccolo."

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Music Quotes , Body Quotes