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Humorous Quotes
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Humorous Quotes 192
- There are many humorous things in the world; among them, the white man's notion that he is less savage than the other savages.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Inspiration Quotes
- Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers.
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Witty Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I sometimes wonder if the manufacturers of foolproof items keep a fool or two on their payroll to test things.
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Tags : Alan Coren Quotes , Funny Inspirational Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Doctors will have more lives to answer for in the next world than even we generals.
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Tags : Napoleon Bonaparte Quotes , War Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Humor is also a way of saying something serious.
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Tags : T. S. Eliot Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Think! I've got enough to do, and little enough to get for it, without thinking.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Don't you drink? I notice you speak slightingly of the bottle. I have drunk since I was fifteen and few things have given me more pleasure.
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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- You can only drink 30 or 40 glasses of beer a day, no matter how rich you are.
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Tags : Adolphus Busch Quotes , Money Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I have attended operas, whenever I could not help it, for fourteen years now; I am sure I know of no agony comparable to the listening to an unfamiliar opera.
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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- One dumb-bell, Watson! Consider an athlete with one dumb-bell. Picture to yourself the unilateral development - the imminent danger of a spinal curvature. Shocking, Watson, shocking!
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Athlete Quotes
- The devil is not, indeed, perfectly humorous, but that is only because he is the extreme of all humor.
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Tags : Samuel Taylor Coleridge Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Devil Quotes
- Poor Mr. Pickwick! ... If he played a wrong card, Miss Bolo looked a small armoury of daggers; if he stopped to consider which was the right one, Lady Snuphanuph would throw herself back in her chair, and smile with a mingled glance of impatience and pity to Mrs. Colonel Wugsby, at which Mrs. Colonel Wugsby would shrug up her shoulders, and cough, as much as to say she wondered whether he ever would begin.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- She say, Celie, tell the truth, have you ever found God in church? I never did. I just found a bunch of folks hoping for him to show.
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Tags : Alice Walker Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- "Why, I don't exactly know about perjury, my dear sir," replied the little gentleman. "Harsh word, my dear sir, very harsh word indeed. It's a legal fiction, my dear sir, nothing more."
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- Let me see you ride a donkey over my green again, and as sure as you have a head upon your shoulders, I'll knock your bonnet off, and tread upon it!
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I never said all Democrats were saloonkeepers. What I said was that all saloonkeepers are Democrats.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- I have made up my mind that I must have money, Pa. I feel that I can't beg it, borrow it, or steal it; and so I have resolved that I must marry it.
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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes
- An absence of antecedents and of relatives is sometimes an aid rather than an impediment to social advancement . . .
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes
- There seems to me to be absolutely no limit to the inanity and credulity of the human race. Homo Sapiens! Homo idioticus!
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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes
- Thou slave, thou wretch, thou coward! Thou little valiant, great in villainy! Thou ever strong upon the stronger side! Thou Fortune's champion, that dost never fight But where her humorous ladyship is by To teach thee safety.
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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Strong Quotes , Humorous Quotes