• Categories
  • Mark Twain Quotes   2407
  • Would it not be prudent to get our civilization tools together, and see how much stock is left on hand in the way of Glass Beads and Theology, and Maxim Guns and Hymn Books, and Trade Gin and Torches of Progress and Enlightenment (patent adjustable ones, good to fire villages with, upon occasion), and balance the books, and arrive at the profit and loss, so that we may intelligently decide whether to continue the business or sellout the property and start a new Civilization Scheme on the proceeds.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Loss Quotes
  • I have damaged my intellect trying to imagine why a man should want to invent a repeating clock, and how another man could be found to lust after it and buy it. The man who can guess these riddles is far on the way to guess why the human race was invented - which is another riddle which tires me.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Race Quotes
  • India is, the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend, and the great grand mother of tradition. our most valuable and most instructive materials in the history of man are treasured up in India only.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mother Quotes , Past Quotes
  • The election makes me think of a story of a man who was dying. He had only two minutes to live, so he sent for a clergyman and asked him, "Where is the best place to go to?" He was undecided about it. So the minister told him that each place had its advantages--heaven for climate, and hell for society.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Thinking Quotes
  • Every improvement that is put upon the real estate is the result of an idea in somebody's head. The skyscraper is another idea; the railroad is another; the telephone and all those things are merely symbols which represent ideas. An andiron, a wash-tub, is the result of an idea that did not exist before.
  • 6 years ago



    Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Real Quotes , Science Quotes