Mark Twain Quotes, Inspirational Quotes, Funny Quotes

I was gratified to be able to answer promptly, and I did. I said I didn't know.

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Man never creates, he only recombines the lines and colors of his own existance.

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I must have a prodigious quantity of mind; it takes me as much as a week sometimes to make it up.

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Necessity is the mother of taking chances.

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Imagination labors best in distant fields.

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...one should be gentle with the ignorant, for they are the chosen of God.

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One of the most striking differences between a cat and a lie is that a cat has only nine lives.

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Priapism is what happens when someone gets strangulated to the point of hypoxia.

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History may not repeat, but it often rhymes.

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The man who is ostentatious of his modesty is twin to the statue that wears a fig-leaf.

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This autobiography of mine is a mirror, and I am looking at myself in it all the time. Incidentally I notice the people that pass along at my back - I get glimpses of them in the mirror - and whenever they say or do anything that can help advertise me and flatter me and raise me in my own estimation, I set these things down in my autobiography.

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Perhaps it will be simplest to throw away the tags and generalize India with one all-comprehensive name, as the Land of Wonders.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Land Quotes , Names Quotes

Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Passion Quotes , Abstinence Quotes

The idea that no gentleman ever swears is all wrong. He can swear and still be a gentleman if he does it in a nice and benevolent and affectionate way.

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Don't look at the world with your hands in your pockets. To write about it you have to reach out and touch it.

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I am not one of those who in expressing opinions confine themselves to facts.

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You must not pay a person a compliment, and then straightway follow it with a criticism.

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I have learned that human existence is essentially tragic. It is only the love of God, disclosed and enacted in Christ, that redeems the human tragedy and makes it tolerable. No, more than tolerable. Wonderful.

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When all is said and done, the one sole condition that makes spiritual happiness and preserves it is the absence of doubt.

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Where a blood relation sobs, an intimate friend should choke up, a distant acquaintance should sigh, a stranger should merely fumble sympathetically with his handkerchief.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Blood Quotes , Stranger Quotes