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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- There is nothing new under the sun but there are lots of old things we don't know.
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- SPOOKER, n. A writer whose imagination concerns itself with supernatural phenomena, especially in the doings of spooks.
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- Life - a spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay.
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- When publicly censured our first instinct is to make everybody a codefendant.
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- Nothing is more logical than persecution. Religious tolerance is a kind of infidelity.
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- LIVER, n. A large red organ thoughtfully provided by nature to be bilious with. The liver is heaven's best gift to the goose; without it that bird would be unable to supply us with the Strasbourg "pate".
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- KING, n. A male person commonly known in America as a "crowned head," although he never wears a crown and has usually no head to speak of.
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- Historian - a broad-gauge gossip.
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- PALACE, n. A fine and costly residence, particularly that of a great official. The residence of a high dignitary of the Christian Church is called a palace; that of the Founder of his religion was known as a field, or wayside. There is progress.
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- Immoral" is the judgment of the stalled ox on the gamboling lamb.
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- MIND, n. A mysterious form of matter secreted by the brain. Its chief activity consists in the endeavour to ascertain its own nature, the futility of the attempt being due to the fact that it has nothing but itself to know itself with.
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- Laziness. Unwarranted repose of manner in a person of low degree.
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- ROPE, n. An obsolescent appliance for reminding assassins that they too are mortal. It is put about the neck and remains in place one's whole life long.
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- actually, adv. Perhaps; possibly.
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- To apologize is to lay the foundation for a future offense.
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- INTENTION, n. The mind's sense of the prevalence of one set of influences over another set; an effect whose cause is the imminence, immediate or remote, of the performance of an involuntary act.
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- SERIAL, n. A literary work, usually a story that is not true, creeping through several issues of a newspaper or magazine.
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- UBIQUITY, n. The gift or power of being in all places at one time, but not in all places at all times, which is omnipresence, an attribute of God and the luminiferous ether only.
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- SEINE, n. A kind of net for effecting an involuntary change of environment. For fish it is made strong and coarse, but women are more easily taken with a singularly delicate fabric weighted with small, cut stones.
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- Backbite: To ''speak of a man as you find him'' when he can't find you.
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