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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- A person who doubts himself is like a man who would enlist in the ranks of his enemies and bear arms agains himself. He makes his failure certain by himself being the first person to be convinced of it.
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- INTIMACY, n. A relation into which fools are providentially drawn for their mutual destruction.
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- Male, A member of the unconsidered or negligible gender. The male of the human race is commonly known to the female as Mere Man. The Genus has two varieties: good providers and bad providers.
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- REACH, n. The radius of action of the human hand. The area within which it is possible (and customary) to gratify directly the propensity to provide.
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- Don't board with the devil if you wish to be fat.
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- Creditor. One of a tribe of savages dwelling beyond the Financial Straits and dreaded for their desolating incursions.
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- For every man there is something in the vocabulary that would stick to him like a second skin. His enemies have only to find it.
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- A wedding is a ceremony at which two persons undertake to become one, one undertakes to become nothing, and nothing undertakes to become supportable.
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- Good-bye -- if you hear of my being stood up against a stone wall and shot to rags please know that I think that a pretty good way to depart this life. It beats old age, disease or falling down the cellar stairs.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wall Quotes , Fall Quotes
- MONARCH, n. A person engaged in reigning. Formerly the monarch ruled, as the derivation of the word attests, and as many subjects have had occasion to learn.
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- HOMOEOPATHY, n. A school of medicine midway between Allopathy and Christian Science. To the last both the others are distinctly inferior, for Christian Science will cure imaginary diseases, and they can not.
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- Don't steal; thou'lt never thus compete successfully in business. Cheat.
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- BEGGAR, n. One who has relied on the assistance of his friends.
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- Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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- EXISTENCE, n. A transient, horrible, fantastic dream,/ Wherein is nothing yet all things do seem:/ From which we're wakened by a friendly nudge/ Of our bedfellow Death, and cry: "O fudge!"
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- Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.
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- Prejudice - a vagrant opinion without visible means of support.
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- BAIT, n. A preparation that renders the hook more palatable. The best kind is beauty.
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- FIB, n. A lie that has not cut its teeth. An habitual liar's nearest approach to truth: the perigee of his eccentric orbit.
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- PLAGUE, n. In ancient times a general punishment of the innocent for admonition of their ruler, as in the familiar instance of Pharaoh the Immune. The plague today . . . is merely Nature's fortuitous manifestation of her purposeless objectionableness.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Time Quotes , Nature Quotes