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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- EMOTION, n. A prostrating disease caused by a determination of the heart to the head. It is sometimes accompanied by a copious discharge of hydrated chloride of sodium from the eyes.
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- Self-denial is indulgence of a propensity to forego.
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- Rhubarb: essence of stomach ache.
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- Nonsense, n. The objections that are urged against this excellent dictionary.
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- Intolerance is natural and logical, for in every dissenting opinion lies an assumption of superior wisdom.
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- Evolutionary biology is genuinely scientific, but more than that it opens the door to a world more marvellous than any Christian fundamentalist has ever read into the pages of the Bible.
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- Immortality: A toy which people cry for, And on their knees apply for, Dispute, contend and lie for, And if allowed Would be right proud Eternally to die for.
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- picture, n. A representation in two dimensions of something wearisome in three.
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- CARNIVOROUS, adj. Addicted to the cruelty of devouring the timorous vegetarian, his heirs and assigns.
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- Hash, x. There is no definition for this word - nobody knows what hash is. Famous, adj. Conspicuously miserable. Dictionary, n. A malevolent literary device for cramping the growth of a language and making it hard and inelastic. This dictionary, however, is a most useful work.
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- Democracy is four wolves and a lamb voting on what to have for lunch.
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- PRE-EXISTENCE, n. An unnoted factor in creation.
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- DEGRADATION, n. One of the stages of moral and social progress from private station to political preferment.
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- Woman absent is woman dead.
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- REACH, n. The radius of action of the human hand. The area within which it is possible (and customary) to gratify directly the propensity to provide.
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- Aristocrats: n. fellows that wear downy hats and clean shirts - guilty of education and suspected of bank accounts.
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- OUTCOME, n. A particular type of disappointment . . . . judged by the outcome, the result. This is immortal nonsense; the wisdom of an act is to be juded by the light that the doer had when he performed it.
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- If you would be accounted great by your contemporaries, be not too much greater than they.
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- NON-COMBATANT, n. A dead Quaker.
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- ACCOUNTABILITY, n. The mother of caution.
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