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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- HAND, n. A singular instrument worn at the end of the human arm and commonly thrust into somebody's pocket.
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- NIHILIST, n. A Russian who denies the existence of anything but Tolstoi. The leader of the school is Tolstoi.
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- LANGUAGE, n. The music with which we charm the serpents guarding another's treasure.
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- INCOMPOSSIBLE, adj. Unable to exist if something else exists. Two things are incompossible when the world of being has scope enough for one of them, but not enough for both - as Walt Whitman's poetry and God's mercy to man.
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- MULTITUDE, n. A crowd; the source of political wisdom and virtue. In a republic, the object of the statesman's adoration.
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- Convictions are variable; to be always consistent is to be sometimes dishonest.
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- Feast, n. A festival. A religious celebration usually signalized by gluttony and drunkenness, frequently in honor of some holy person distinguished for abstemiousness.
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- I was born to poor because of honest parents.
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- OBLIVION, n. Cold storage for high hopes. A place where ambitious authors meet their works without pride and their betters without envy. A dormitory without an alarm clock.
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- Quill: An instrument of torture yielded by a goose and commonly weilded by as ass.
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- REVEILLE, n. A signal to sleeping soldiers to dream of battlefields no more, but get up and have their blue noses counted.
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- EXILE, n. One who serves his country by residing abroad, yet is not an ambassador.
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- Heaven lies about us in our infancy and the world begins lying about us pretty soon afterward.
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- Speak when you are angry and you will make the best speech you will ever regret.
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- I think that I think, therefore I think that I am.
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- MOUTH, n. In man, the gateway to the soul; in woman, the outlet of the heart.
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- EUCHARIST, n. A sacred feast of the religious sect of Theophagi. A dispute once unhappily arose among the members of this sect as to what it was that they ate. In this controversy some five hundred thousand have already been slain, and the question is still unsettled.
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- gratitude, n. A sentiment lying midway between a benefit received and a benefit expected.
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- RITE, n. A religious or semi-religious ceremony fixed by law, precept or custom, with the essential oil of sincerity carefully squeezed out of it.
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- The poor man's price of admittance to the favor of the rich is his self-respect.
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