Charles Dickens Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humorous Quotes

Think! I've got enough to do, and little enough to get for it, without thinking.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The devil is not, indeed, perfectly humorous, but that is only because he is the extreme of all humor.

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Tags : Samuel Taylor Coleridge Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Devil Quotes

Give a small boy a hammer and he will find that everything he encounters needs pounding.

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Tags : Abraham Kaplan Quotes , Children Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Man is a rational animal who always loses his temper when he is called upon to act in accordance with the dictates of reason.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Animal Quotes

The sky was of the deepest blue, with a few white, fleecy clouds drifting lazily across it, and the air was filled with the low drone of insects or with a sudden sharper note as bee or bluefly shot past with its quivering, long-drawn hum, like an insect tuning-fork.

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

Brothers are a blessing for one thing. There is no possibility of any young lady getting unreasonably conceited if she be endowed with them.

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Brother Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Eating and sleeping are the only activities that should be allowed to interrupt a man's enjoyment of his cigar.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I have never examined the subject of humor until now. I am surprised to find how much ground it covers. I have got its divisions and frontiers down on a piece of paper. I find it defined as a production of the brain, as the power of the brain to produce something humorous, and the capacity of percieving humor.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Brain Quotes

It is our American habit if we find the foundations of our educational structure unsatisfactory to add another story or wing.

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Education Quotes , Humorous Quotes

But soft you, the fair Ophelia: Ope not thy ponderous and marble jaws, But get thee to a nunnery - go!

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Ophelia Quotes

There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Profound Quotes

A God who cannot smile, could not have created this humorous universe.

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Tags : Sri Aurobindo Quotes , God Quotes , Humorous Quotes

... an experienced, industrious, ambitious, and often quite often picturesque liar.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Liars Quotes , Humorous Quotes

"Dr. Munro, sir," said he, "I am a walking museum. You could fit what ISN'T the matter with me on to the back of a -- visiting card. If there's any complaint you want to make a special study of, just you come to me, sir, and see what I can do for you. It's not every one that can say that he has had cholera three times, and cured himself by living on red pepper and brandy."

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

We (The British) have not journeyed across the centuries, across the oceans, across the mountains, across the prairies, because we are made of sugar candy.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Ocean Quotes

Poetry's unnat'ral; no man ever talked poetry 'cept a beadle on boxin' day, or Warren's blackin' or Rowland's oil, or some o' them low fellows; never you let yourself down to talk poetry, my boy.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

Dumb as a drum vith a hole in it, sir.

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

It comes to pass oft that a terrible oath, with a swaggering accent sharply twanged off, gives manhood more approbation than ever proof itself would have earned him.

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Tags : William Shakespeare Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I am engaged in answering that Italian buffoon, Mazotti, whose views upon the larval development of the tropical termites have excited my derision and contempt . . .

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes

Detection is, or ought to be, an exact science, and should be treated in the same cold and unemotional manner. You have attempted to tinge it with romanticism, which produces much the same effect as if you worked a love-story or an elopement into the fifth proposition of Euclid.

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Sarcasm Quotes