Mark Twain Quotes, Writing Quotes, Humble Quotes

An average English word is four letters and a half. By hard, honest labor I've dug all the large words out of my vocabulary and shaved it down till the average is three and a half... I never write metropolis for seven cents, because I can get the same money for city. I never write policeman, because I can get the same price for cop.... I never write valetudinarian at all, for not even hunger and wretchedness can humble me to the point where I will do a word like that for seven cents; I wouldn't do it for fifteen.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Humble Quotes

Happiness ain't a thing in itself - it's only a contrast with something that ain't pleasant.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Happiness Quotes , Contrast Quotes

Comedy keeps the heart sweet; but we all know that there is wholesome refreshment for both mind and heart in an occasional climb among the pomps of the intellectual snow-summits built by Shakespeare and those others.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sweet Quotes , Heart Quotes

What a man misses mostly in heaven is company.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Clever Quotes

Labor in loneliness is irksome.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Loneliness Quotes

Was it my conspicuousness that distressed me? Not at all. It was merely that I was not beautifully conspicuous but uglily conspicuous - it makes all the difference in the world.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Differences Quotes , World Quotes

And what is a man without energy? Nothing - nothing at all.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Men Quotes

Never be haughty to the humble, never be humble to the haughty.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Humble Quotes

Faith is believing things you know aint true

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes

They all laid their heads together like as many lawyers when they are gettin' ready to prove that a man's heirs ain't got any right to his property.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Together Quotes

But old fools is the biggest fools there is.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes

When in doubt, tell the truth. That maxim I did invent, but never expected it to be applied to me. I did say, "When you are in doubt," but when I am in doubt myself I use more sagacity.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Truth Quotes , Doubt Quotes

It is the Creator´s Grand Army, and he is the Commander-in-Chief... With these facts before you, now try to guess man´s chiefest pet name for this ferocious Commander-in-Chief? I will save you the trouble but you must not laugh. It is Our Father in Heaven.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Father Quotes , Army Quotes

There isn't anything so grotesque or so incredible that the average human being can't believe it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Average Quotes

Keep away from people who try to belittle your ambition.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Motivational Quotes

To string incongruities and absurdities together in a wandering and sometimes purposeless way, and seem innocently unaware that they are absurdities, is the basis of the American art, if my position is correct.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Art Quotes , Writing Quotes

Fame is a vapor, popularity an accident; the only earthly certainty is oblivion.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspiration Quotes , Vapor Quotes

I find that the further I go back, the better things were, whether they happened or not.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

To lodge all power in one party and keep it there is to insure bad government and the sure and gradual deterioration of the public morals.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Graduation Quotes , Party Quotes

Damn these human beings; if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Bags Quotes , Damn Quotes