Mark Twain Quotes, Firsts Quotes

You can't reason someone out of something that they weren't reasoned into in the first place.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Firsts Quotes

If we had less statemanship we could get along with fewer battleships.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fewer Quotes

...ignorant as the unborne babe! ignorant as unborn twins!

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Ignorant Quotes

[N]o country can be well governed unless its citizens as a body keep religiously before their minds that they are the guardians of the law and that the law officers are only the machinery for its execution, nothing more.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Country Quotes , Government Quotes

The business aspects of the Fourth of July is not perfect as it stands. See what it costs us every year with loss of life, the crippling of thousands with its fireworks, and the burning down of property. It is not only sacred to patriotism and universal freedom, but to the surgeon, the undertaker, the insurance offices - and they are working it for all it is worth.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , 4th Of July Quotes , Loss Quotes

Man is a Religious Animal. He is the only Religious Animal. He is the only animal that has the True Religion - several of them.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Atheist Quotes

You thunder and lightning too much; the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Bed Quotes

It is my belief that nearly any invented quotation, played with confidence, stands a good chance to deceive.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lying Quotes , Deceit Quotes

Denial is much more then an Egyptian River.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Rivers Quotes , Denial Quotes

Ours is the "land of the free"-nobody denies that-nobody challenges it. (Maybe it is because we won't let other people testify.)

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Land Quotes , People Quotes

The cigar-box which the European calls a 'lift' needs but to be compared with our elevators to be appreciated. The lift stops to reflect between floors. That is all right in a hearse, but not in elevators. The American elevator acts like a man's patent purge-it works.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Science Quotes , Men Quotes

When your watch gets out of order you have choice of two things to do: throw it in the fire or take it to the watch-tinker. The former is the quickest.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fire Quotes , Order Quotes

A wise man does not waste so good a commodity as lying for naught.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wise Quotes , Lying Quotes

History doesn't repeat itself; it rhymes.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Rhyme Quotes

What ought to be done to the man who invented the celebrating of anniversaries? Mere killing would be too light.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Anniversary Quotes

What a lie it is to call this a free country, where none but the unworthy and undeserving may swear.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Country Quotes , Lying Quotes

The more things are forbidden, the more popular they become.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Literature Quotes , Forbidden Fruit Quotes

The trouble with most of us is that we know too much that ain't so.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Too Much Quotes

Humor is the great thing, the saving thing after all. The minute it crops up, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations, and resentments flit away, and a sunny spirit takes their place.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Yield Quotes

How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my hand.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Believe Quotes