Mark Twain Quotes, Opera Quotes, Belief Quotes

The banging and slamming and booming and crashing were something beyond belief. [On Lohengrin]

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Opera Quotes , Belief Quotes

I am technically "boss" of the family which I am carrying along-but I am grateful to know that it is only technically - that the real authority rests on the other side of the house. It is placed there by a beneficent Providence, who foresaw before I was born, or, if he did not, he has found it out since - that I am not in any way qualified to travel alone.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Travel Quotes , Real Quotes

Let us save the tomorrows for work.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes

for business reasons, I must preserve the outward signs of sanity.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sanity Quotes , Reason Quotes

Last week, I stated this woman was the ugliest woman I had ever seen. I have since been visited by her sister, and now wish to withdraw that statement.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Often a quite assified remark becomes sanctified by use and petrified by custom; it is then a permanency, its term of activity a geologic period.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Use Quotes , Periods Quotes

Habit is habit, and not to be flung out of the window by any man, but coaxed down-stairs one step at a time.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Time Quotes , Men Quotes

If you have to swallow a frog, don't stare at it too long.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Long Quotes , Frogs Quotes

If I'd seen a playwright ever write an' play at the same time, I'd have given 'em more of a chance at cards. Can I get an 'amen?'

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Play Quotes

If it's your job to eat a frog, it's best to do it first thing in the morning. And If it's your job to eat two frogs, it's best to eat the biggest one first.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Good Morning Quotes , Jobs Quotes

April 1. This is the day upon which we are reminded of what we are on the other three hundred and sixty-four.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

If we had less statemanship we could get along with fewer battleships.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fewer Quotes

There are no witches. The witch text remains; only the practice has changed. Hell fire is gone, but the text remains. Infant damnation is gone, but the text remains. More than two hundred death penalties are gone from the law books, but the texts that authorized them remain.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Fire Quotes

The ignorant are afraid to betray surprise or admiration...they think it ill manners.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Thinking Quotes

Scientists have odious manners, except when you prop up their theory; then you can borrow money off them.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Money Quotes , Science Quotes

Agassiz does recommend authors to eat fish, because the phosphorus in it makes brains. But I cannot help you to a decision about the amount you need to eat. Perhaps a couple of whales would be enough.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Couple Quotes , Whales Quotes

God only exhibits his thunder and lightning at intervals, and so they always command attention.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Writing Quotes

English humor is hard to appreciate, though, unless you are trained to it. The English papers, in reporting my speeches, always put 'laughter' in the wrong place.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Laughter Quotes , Humor Quotes

India is, the cradle of the human race, the birthplace of human speech, the mother of history, the grandmother of legend, and the great grand mother of tradition. our most valuable and most instructive materials in the history of man are treasured up in India only.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mother Quotes , Past Quotes

There are several kinds of stories, but only one difficult kind-the humorous.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humorous Quotes , Stories Quotes