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Mark Twain Quotes
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Mark Twain Quotes 2407
- Concerning the difference between man and the jackass: some observers hold that there isn't any. But this wrongs the jackass.
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- Education is what remains when what is learned has been taken away.
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- If the world ends, I'll just head on down to Kentucky because they're always 20 years behind.
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- If you need help identifying actionable analytics check out this post.
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- You should never trust a man who has only one way to spell a word.
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- There ain't nothing more to write about and I'm rotten glad of it, because if I'd know'd what trouble it was to make a book, I wouldn't a tackled it.
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- There is only one good sex. The female one.
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- Books are the liberated spirits of men.
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- The Moral Sense teaches us what is right, and how to avoid it-when unpopular.
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- And I urge upon you this - which I think is wisdom - if you find you can't make seventy by any but an uncomfortable road, don't you go.
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- Every inventor is a crackpot until his idea succeeds.
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- Thanksgiving Day - Let all give humble, hearty, and sincere thanks, now, but the turkeys. In the island of Fiji they do not use turkeys, they use plumbers. It does not become you and me to sneer at Fiji.
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- No temperance society which is well officered and which has the real good of our fellow-men in view, will ever get drunk save in the seclusion of its temperance hall.
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- It is by the goodness of God that in our country we have those three unspeakably precious things: freedom of speech, freedom of conscience, and the prudence never to practice either of them.
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- Rise early. It is the early bird that catches the worm. Don't be fooled by this absurd law; I once knew a man who tried it. He got up at sunrise and a horse bit him.
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- The best cure for Christianity is reading the Bible.
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- It is a mistake that there is no bath that will cure people's manners, but drowning would help.
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- A distinguished man should be as particular about his last words as he is about his last breath. He should write them out on a slip of paper and take the judgment of his friends on them. He should never leave such a thing to the last hour of his life, and trust to an intellectual spurt at the last moment to enable him to say something smart with his latest gasp and launch into eternity with grandeur.
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- My land, the power of training! Of influence! Of education! It can bring a body up to believe anything.
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- Never miss an opportunity to shut up.
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