Mark Twain Quotes, Taken Quotes, Cake Quotes

Nothing seems to please a fly so much as to be taken for a currant; and if it can be baked in a cake and palmed off on the unwary, it dies happy.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Taken Quotes , Cake Quotes

That's the difference between governments and individuals. Governments don't care, individuals do.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Government Quotes , Differences Quotes

History doesn't repeat itself; it rhymes.

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A banker is a fellow who lends you his umbrella when the sun is shining, but wants it back the minute it begins to rain.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Motivational Quotes

It was the schoolboy who said, ""Faith is believing what you know ain't so.""

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Faith Quotes , Atheist Quotes

He had an uncommon fondness for cats. As an old man summering in New Hampshire, Twain even rented kittens from a nearby farm to keep him company until he returned home. "If man could be crossed with the cat," said Twain, "it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat." There's always something about your success that displeases even your best friends.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Life Quotes , Cat Quotes

It is a good idea to obey all the rules when you're young just so you'll have the strength to break them when you're old.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ideas Quotes , Breaking Rules Quotes

In truth I care little about any party's politicsthe man behind it is the important thing.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Party Quotes , Men Quotes

I said there was nothing so convincing to an Indian as a general massacre. If he could not approve of the massacre, I said the next surest thing for an Indian was soap and education. Soap and education are not as sudden as a massacre, but they are more deadly in the long run; because a half-massacred Indian may recover, but if you educate him and wash him, it is bound to finish him some time or other.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Running Quotes , Educational Quotes

Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I am quite sure now that often, very often, in matters concerning religion and politics a man's reasoning powers are not above the monkey's.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Men Quotes

Sometimes too much to drink is barely enough.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Drinking Quotes , Alcohol Quotes

What's your name?" "Becky Thatcher. What's yours? Oh, I know. It's Thomas Sawyer." "That's the name they lick me by. I'm Tom when I'm good. You call me Tom, will you?" "Yes

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Names Quotes , Becky Quotes

Drag your thoughts away from your troubles... by the ears, by the heels, or any other way you can manage it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Good Life Quotes , Cancer Quotes

We all do no end of feeling, and we mistake it for thinking.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mistake Quotes , Thinking Quotes

Nothing so needs reforming as other people's habits. Fanatics will never learn that, though it be written in letters of gold across the sky. It is the prohibition that makes anything precious.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sky Quotes , People Quotes

Pity is for the living, envy is for the dead. Death, the refuge, the solace, the best and kindliest and most prized friend and benefactor of the erring, the forsaken, the old and weary and broken of heart.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Death Quotes , Heart Quotes

...ignorant as the unborne babe! ignorant as unborn twins!

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The secret of making progress is to get started.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Secret Quotes

The only difference between reality and fiction is that fiction needs to be credible.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Reality Quotes , Differences Quotes