Mark Twain Quotes, Money Quotes, Bitterness Quotes

Unexpected money is a delight. The same sum is a bitterness when you expected more.

6 years ago

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I shall never use profanity except in discussing house rent and taxes.

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Talking of patriotism, what humbug it is; it is a word which always commemorates a robbery.

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To be satisfied with what one has; that is wealth. As long as one sorely needs a certain additional amount, that man isn't rich.

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Never argue with a fool, onlookers may not be able to tell the difference.

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Imagination labors best in distant fields.

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I am personally acquainted with hundreds of journalists, and the opinion of the majority of them would not be worth tuppence in private, but when they speak in print it is the newspaper that is talking (the pygmy scribe is not visible) and then their utterances shake the community like the thunders of prophecy.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Media Quotes , Talking Quotes

I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Humorous Quotes

That is a simple rule, and easy to remember. When I, a thoughtful and unblessed Presbyterian, examine the Koran, I know that beyond any question every Mohammedan is insane; not in all things, but in religious matters.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Thoughtful Quotes

A little lie can travel half way 'round the world while Truth is still lacing up her boots.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lying Quotes , Boots Quotes

The radical of one century is the conservative of the next.

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Where every man in a state has a vote, brutal laws are impossible.

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The trouble with most of us is that we know too much that ain't so.

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Homely truth is unpalatable.

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No man has an appreciation so various that his judgment is good upon all varieties of literary work.

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People who love sausage and respect the law should never watch either being made.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Law Quotes , People Quotes

So avoid using the word 'very' because it's lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Don't use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason, boys - to woo women - and, in that endeavor, laziness will not do. It also won't do in your essays. What you do today is important, because you are sacrificing a day of your life for it. Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Tired Quotes , Sacrifice Quotes

You believe in a book that has talking animals, wizards, witches, demons, sticks turning into snakes, burning bushes, food falling from the sky, people walking on water, and all sorts of magical, absurd and primitive stories, and you say that we are the ones that need help?

6 years ago

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Nothing is so ignorant as a man's left hand, except a lady's watch.

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There is nothing more awe-inspiring than a miracle except the credulity that can take it at par.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Miracle Quotes , Awe Inspiring Quotes