Mark Twain Quotes, Money Quotes, Science Quotes

Scientists have odious manners, except when you prop up their theory; then you can borrow money off them.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Money Quotes , Science Quotes

We despise all reverences and all objects of reverence which are outside the pale of our list of sacred things. And yet, with strange inconsistency, we are shocked when other people despise and defile the things which are holy to us.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , People Quotes , Religion Quotes

I've never let my school interfere with my education.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Graduation Quotes

I am an old man and have known a great many troubles, but most of them never happened.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

You have noticed that the human being is a curiosity. In times past he has had (and worn out and flung away) hundreds and hundreds of religions; today he has hundreds and hundreds of religions, and launches not fewer than three new ones every year. I could enlarge on that number and still be within the facts.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Past Quotes , Years Quotes

What a lie it is to call this a free country, where none but the unworthy and undeserving may swear.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Country Quotes , Lying Quotes

The Bible has noble poetry in it... and some good morals and a wealth of obscenity, and upwards of a thousand lies.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Life Quotes

A gifted person ought to learn English (barring spelling and pronouncing) in thirty hours, French in thirty days, and German in thirty years.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , German Language Quotes , Years Quotes

Morals consist of political morals, commercial morals, ecclesiastical morals, and morals.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Political Quotes

I notice that you use plain, simple language, short words and brief sentences. That is the way to write English - it is the modern way and the best way. Stick to it; don't let fluff and flowers and verbosity creep in.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Flower Quotes , Writing Quotes

December is the toughest month of the year. Others are July, January, September, April, November, May, March, June, October, August, and February.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , June Quotes , July Quotes

New Year's is a harmless annual institution, of no particular use to anybody save as a scapegoat for promiscuous drunks, and friendly calls and humbug resolutions.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Marriage Quotes

When everyone is looking for gold, it's a good time to be in the pick and shovel business.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Business Quotes , Gold Quotes

People who always feel jolly, no matter where they are or what happens to themwho have the organ of hope preposterously developedwho are endowed with an uncongealable sanguine temperamentwho never feel concerned about the price of cornand who cannot, by any possibility, discover any but the bright side of a pictureare very apt to go to extremes, and exaggerate with 40-horse microscopic power.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Horse Quotes , People Quotes

Love is not a product of reasonings and statistics. It just comes-none knows whence-and cannot explain itself.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love Quotes , Knowing Quotes

The two Testaments are interesting, each in its own way. The Old one gives us a picture of these people's Deity as he was before he got religion, the other one gives us a picture of him as he appeared afterward.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Two Quotes , People Quotes

An author values a compliment even when it comes from a source of doubtful competency.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Appreciation Quotes , Writing Quotes

A man who keeps company with glaciers comes to feel tolerably insignificant by and by.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Glaciers Quotes

Between believing a thing and thinking you KNOW is only a small step and quickly taken.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Taken Quotes

When an honest writer discovers an imposition it is his simple duty to strip it bare and hurl it down from its place of honor, no matter who suffers by it; any other course would render him unworthy of the public confidence.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Simple Quotes