Mark Twain Quotes, Funny Quotes, Sports Quotes

Golf is a good walk spoiled.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes

There was a great difference in boats, of course. For a long time I was on a boat that was so slow we used to forget what year it was we left port in.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Years Quotes , Differences Quotes

Most men die at 27, we just bury them at 72.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes

When you catch an adjective, kill it. No, I don't mean utterly, but kill most of them--then the rest will be valuable. They weaken when they are close together. They give strength when they are far apart.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Mean Quotes

You must not pay a person a compliment, and then straightway follow it with a criticism.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Criticism Quotes , Pay Quotes

I am not one of those who in expressing opinions confine themselves to facts.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Science Quotes , Facts Quotes

Ignorance, intolerance, egotism, self-assertion, opaque perception, dense and pitiful chuckle headedness - and an almost pathetic unconsciousness of it all, that is what I was at nineteen and twenty.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Self Quotes

Always tell the truth. That way you don't have to remember what you said.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Truth Quotes , Honesty Quotes

Against a diseased imagination demonstration goes for nothing.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Imagination Quotes , Atheism Quotes

Geniuses are people who dash off weird, wild, incomprehensible poems with astonishing facility, & then go & get booming drunk & sleep in the gutter. Genius elevates a man to ineffable speres [sic] far above the vulgar world, & fills his soul with a regal contempt for the gross & sordid things of earth. It is probably on account of this that people who have genius do not pay their board, as a general thing.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sleep Quotes , Men Quotes

If you do read the newspaper you are misinformed.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Newspapers Quotes , Uninformed Quotes

Now when I had mastered the language of this water, and had come to know every trifling feature that bordered the great river as familiarly as I knew the letters of the alphabet, I had made a valuable acquisition. But I had lost something, too. I had lost something which could never be restored me while I lived. All the grace, the beauty, the poetry, had gone out of the majestic river!

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Rivers Quotes , Water Quotes

I was born modest; not all over, but in spots.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Born Quotes , Spots Quotes

That's the difference between governments and individuals. Governments don't care, individuals do.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Government Quotes , Differences Quotes

All gods are better than their reputation.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Novelists Quotes

Honesty is the best policy - when there is money in it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

Names are not always what they seem.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Names Quotes , Labyrinth Quotes

It is easier for a cannibal to enter the Kingdom of Heaven through the eye of a rich man's needle that it is for any other foreigner to read the terrible German script.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Eye Quotes , Men Quotes

I heard a Californian student in Heidelberg say, in one of his calmest moods, that he would rather decline two drinks than one German adjective.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Music Quotes , Two Quotes

If there wasn't anything to find out, it would be dull. Even trying to find out and not finding out is just as interesting as trying to find out and finding out; and I don't know but more so.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Discovery Quotes , Interesting Quotes