Mark Twain Quotes, Education Quotes, Dog Quotes

Every time you stop a school, you will have to build a jail. What you gain at one end you lose at the other. It's like feeding a dog on his own tail. It won't fatten the dog.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Education Quotes , Dog Quotes

In the small town of Hannibal, Missouri, when I was a boy, everybody was poor, but didn't know it; and everybody was comfortable and did know it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Boys Quotes , Towns Quotes

It is your human environment that makes climate

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , People Quotes , Humanity Quotes

We may not doubt that society in heaven consists mainly of undesirable persons.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Heaven Quotes , Doubt Quotes

I do see that there is an argument against suicide: the grief of the worshipers left behind, the awful famine in their hearts, these are too costly terms for the release.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Suicide Quotes , Grief Quotes

If I cannot smoke in heaven, then I shall not go.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

The gentle reader will never, never know what a consummate ass he can become until he goes abroad.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Travel Quotes , Ass Quotes

There are no standards of taste in wine... Each man's own taste is the standard, and a majority vote cannot decide for him or in any slightest degree affect the supremacy of his own standard.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Food Quotes , Wine Quotes

Now I can only pray that there may be a God -- and a heaven -- or something better.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Heaven Quotes

Optimist: day-dreamer in his small clothes.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Optimistic Quotes , Clothes Quotes

The cayote is a living, breathing allegory of Want. He is always hungry. He is always poor, out of luck and friendless. The meanest creatures despise him, and even the fleas would desert him for a velocipede.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Breathing Quotes , Luck Quotes

The older we grow the greater becomes our wonder at how much ignorance one can contain without bursting one's clothes.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Time Quotes , Ignorance Quotes

History has tried hard to teach us that we can't have good government under politicians. Now, to go and stick one at the very head of the government couldn't be wise.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wise Quotes , Government Quotes

Ignorance is not, not knowing something. It is knowing what isn't so.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ignorance Quotes , Knowing Quotes

Hunger is the handmaid of genius

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Genius Quotes , Hunger Quotes

In love, you pay as you leave.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Love You Quotes

He had only one vanity; he thought he could give advice better than any other person.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Vanity Quotes , Giving Quotes

Congressman is the trivialist distinction for a full grown man.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Congress Quotes

A sin takes on a new and real terror when there seems a chance that it is going to be found out.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Real Quotes , Chance Quotes

I pledged myself to smoke but one cigar a day. I kept the cigar waiting until bedtime, then I had a luxurious time with it. But desire persecuted me every day and all day long. I found myself hunting for larger cigars...within the month my cigar had grown to such proportions I could have used it as a crutch.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hunting Quotes , Long Quotes