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  • Ambrose Bierce Quotes   976
  • ZENITH, n. The point in the heavens directly overhead to a man standing or a growing cabbage. A man in bed or a cabbage in the pot is not considered as having a zenith, though Horizontalists hold that the posture of the body was immaterial.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , Heaven Quotes
  • MALTHUSIAN, adj. Pertaining to Malthus and his doctrines, who believed in artificially limiting population, but found that it could not be done by talking. Herod of Judea, all the famous soldiers have been practical exponents of the Malthusian idea.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Talking Quotes , Ideas Quotes
  • EUCHARIST, n. A sacred feast of the religious sect of Theophagi. A dispute once unhappily arose among the members of this sect as to what it was that they ate. In this controversy some five hundred thousand have already been slain, and the question is still unsettled.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Religious Quotes , Food Quotes
  • TECHNICALITY, n. In an English court a man named Home was tried for slander in having accused his neighbor of murder. His exact words were: "Sir Thomas Holt hath taken a cleaver and stricken his cook upon the head, so that one side of the head fell upon one shoulder and the other side upon the other shoulder." The defendant was acquitted by instruction of the court, the learned judges holding that the words did not charge murder, for they did not affirm the death of the cook, that being only an inference.
    • 5 years ago



    Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Taken Quotes , Home Quotes