Ambrose Bierce Quotes, Military Quotes, Stupidity Quotes

RASCALITY, n. Stupidity militant. The activity of a clouded intellect.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Military Quotes , Stupidity Quotes

To bother about the best method of accomplishing an accidental result.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Science Quotes , Planning Quotes

Genealogy, n. An account of one's descent from a man who did not particularly care to trace his own.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Family Quotes , Men Quotes

Curiosity, n. An objectionable quality of the female mind. The desire to know whether or not a woman is cursed with curiosity is one of the most active and insatiable passions of the masculine soul.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Passion Quotes , Soul Quotes

Distress: A disease incurred by exposure to the prosperity of a friend.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Disease Quotes , Prosperity Quotes

FROG, n. A reptile with edible legs

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Food Quotes , Science Quotes

Theology is a thing of unreason altogether, an edifice of assumptions and dreams, a superstructure without a substructure

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Dream Quotes , Assumption Quotes

Cat: a soft indestructible automaton provided by nature to be kicked when things go wrong in the domestic circle.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Nature Quotes , Cat Quotes

MONARCHICAL GOVERNMENT, n. Government.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes

moral, adj. Conforming to a local and mutable standard of right. Having the quality of general expediency.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Quality Quotes , Morality Quotes

PALACE, n. A fine and costly residence, particularly that of a great official. The residence of a high dignitary of the Christian Church is called a palace; that of the Founder of his religion was known as a field, or wayside. There is progress.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Christian Quotes , Religion Quotes

HOMILETICS, n. The science of adapting sermons to the spiritual needs, capacities and conditions of the congregation.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Spiritual Quotes , Science Quotes

Education, n.: That which discloses to the wise and disguises from the foolish their lack of understanding.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Education Quotes , Wise Quotes

LEAD, n. A heavy blue-gray metal much used ... as a counterpoise to an argument of such weight that it turns the scale of debate the wrong way. An interesting fact in the chemistry of international controversy is that at the point of contact of two patriotisms lead is precipitated in great quantities.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Science Quotes , Blue Quotes

The ghost is the outward and visible signs of an inward fear.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Fear Quotes , Inward Quotes

PROPERTY, n. Any material thing, having no particular value, that may be held by A against the cupidity of B. Whatever gratifies the passion for possession in one and disappoints it in all others. The object of man's brief rapacity and long indifference.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Passion Quotes

Custard: A detestable substance produced by a malevolent conspiracy of the hen, the cow, and the cook.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Food Quotes , Cooking Quotes

San Francisco is the place where most people were last seen

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , San Francisco Quotes , People Quotes

REBEL, n. A proponent of a new misrule who has failed to establish it.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Failure Quotes

ELEGY, n. A composition in verse, in which, without employing any of the methods of humor, the writer aims to produce in the reader's mind the dampest kind of dejection.

5 years ago

Message Copied

Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Mind Quotes , Kind Quotes