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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- FORCE, n. "Force is but might," the teacher said p/ "That definition's just."/ The boy said naught but throught instead,/ Remembering his pounded head:/ "Force is not might but must!"
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Teacher Quotes , Boys Quotes
- I was born to poor because of honest parents.
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- CEMETERY, n. An isolated suburban spot where mourners match lies, poets write at a target and stone-cutters spell for a wager.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Lying Quotes , Writing Quotes
- ZEUS /n./ The chief of Grecian gods, adored by the Romans as Jupiter and by the modern Americans as God, Gold, Mob and Dog.
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- UNIVERSALIST, n. One who forgoes the advantage of a Hell for persons of another faith.
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- ART, n. This word has no definition. Its origin is related by the ingenious Father Gassalasca Jape as "One day a wag - what would the wretch be at? Shifted a letter of the cipher RAT, And said it was a god's name! . . ."
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Art Quotes , Father Quotes
- Advice: The suggestions you give someone else which you hope will work for your benefit.
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- Selfish, adj. Devoid of consideration for the selfishness of others.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Selfish Quotes , Selfishness Quotes
- What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Country Quotes
- Bigot: One who is obstinately and zealously attached to an opinion that you do not entertain.
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- Future. That period of time in which our affairs prosper, our friends are true and our happiness is assured.
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- PILLORY, n. A mechanical device for inflicting personal distinction - prototype of the modern newspaper conducted by persons of austere virtues and blameless lives.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , Virtue Quotes
- MANNA, n. A food miraculously given to the Israelites in the wilderness. When it was no longer supplied to them they settled down and tilled the soil, fertilizing it, as a rule, with the bodies of the original occupants.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Food Quotes , Cooking Quotes
- Faith: Belief without evidence in what is told by one who speaks without knowledge, of things without parallel.
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- Aborigines, n.: Persons of little worth found cumbering the soil of a newly discovered country. They soon cease to cumber; they fertilize.
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- A system of pitfalls thoughtfully prepared for the feet for the self-made man, along the path by which he advances to distinction.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Men Quotes , Self Quotes
- Doubt, indulged and cherished, is in danger of becoming denial; but if honest, and bent on thorough investigation, it may soon lead to full establishment of the truth.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Doubt Quotes , Denial Quotes
- Don't board with the devil if you wish to be fat.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Wish Quotes , Devil Quotes
- LAWYER, n. One skilled in circumvention of the law.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Law Quotes
- Brain: an apparatus with which we think we think.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Education Quotes , Math Quotes