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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- PIGMY, n. One of a tribe of very small men found by ancient travelers in many parts of the world, but by modern in Central Africa only. The Pigmies are so called to distinguish them from the bulkier Caucasians - who are Hogmies.
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- LIFE, n. A spiritual pickle preserving the body from decay. We live in daily apprehension of its loss; yet when lost it is not missed.
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- PITY, n. A failing sense of exemption, inspired by contrast.
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- To seek a justification for a decision already made.
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- Impiety. Your irreverence toward my deity.
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- INCOMPOSSIBLE, adj. Unable to exist if something else exists. Two things are incompossible when the world of being has scope enough for one of them, but not enough for both - as Walt Whitman's poetry and God's mercy to man.
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- PIANO, n. A parlor utensil for subduing the impenitent visitor. It is operated by depressing the keys of the machine and the spirits of the audience.
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- Age - That period of life in which we compound for the vices that remain by reviling those we have no longer the vigor to commit.
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- Religion. A daughter of Hope and Fear, explaining to Ignorance the nature of the Unknowable.
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- Success is the one unpardonable sin against our fellows.
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- Money. A blessing that is of no advantage to us excepting when we part with it.
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- Evolutionary biology is genuinely scientific, but more than that it opens the door to a world more marvellous than any Christian fundamentalist has ever read into the pages of the Bible.
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- REVOLUTION, n. In politics, an abrupt change in the form of misgovernment. . . . the substitution of the rule of an Administration for that of a Ministry, whereby the welfare and happiness of the people were advanced a full half-inch.
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- NOVEL, n. A short story padded.
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- LIVER, n. A large red organ thoughtfully provided by nature to be bilious with. The liver is heaven's best gift to the goose; without it that bird would be unable to supply us with the Strasbourg "pate".
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- UGLINESS, n. A gift of the gods to certain women, entailing virtue without humility.
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- LUMINARY, One who throws light upon a subject; as an editor by not writing about it.
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- PRICE, n. Value, plus a reasonable sum for the wear and tear of conscience in demanding it.
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- Nonsense, n. The objections that are urged against this excellent dictionary.
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- Uncommon extension of the fear of death.
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