George Bernard Shaw Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humor Quotes

Build a system that even a fool can use, and only a fool will want to use it.

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Morality is not respectability.

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Socialism is the same as Communism, only better English.

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The buried truth germinates and breaks through to the light.

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Marriage is to me apostasy, profanation of the sanctuary of my soul, violation of my manhood, sale of my birthright, shameful surrender, ignominious capitulation, acceptance of defeat.

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Martyrdom is the only path to immortality that requires no talent whatsoever.

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God made the world as an artist and that is why the world must learn from its artists.

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The person who is ignorant enough to believe that his nourishment depends on meat is in a horrible dilemma.

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Whenever you wish to do anything against the law, Cicely, always consult a good solicitor first.

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The pianoforte is the most important of all musical instruments; its invention was to music what the invention of printing was to poetry.

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Crime is only the retail department of what, in wholesale, we call penal law.

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A mind of the caliber of mine cannot derive its nutrient from cows.

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Atrocities are not less atrocities when they occur in laboratories and are called medical research.

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There is no sincerer love than the love of food.

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The price of ability does not depend on merit but on supply and demand.

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A socialist is somebody who doesn't have anything, and is ready to divide it up equally among everybody.

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Hell is not all paved with bad intentions.

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When the military man approaches, the world locks up its spoons and packs off its womankind.

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The universal regard for money is the one hopeful fact in our civilization. Money is the most important thing in the world. It represents health, strength, honor, generosity and beauty . . . . Not the least of its virtues is that it destroys basic people as certainly as it fortifies and dignifies noble people.

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To disbelieve in marriage is easy: to love a married woman is easy; but to betray a comrade, to be disloyal to a host, to break the covenant of bread and salt, is impossible.

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Tags : George Bernard Shaw Quotes , Covenant Quotes , Salt Quotes