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Adam Carolla Quotes
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Adam Carolla Quotes 142
- I'm really just trying to hash out the next two weeks of my life. So, something that is potentially four months down the road is not just a mile down the road for me, it's a million miles down the road.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- The Aston Martin is a beautiful car. It's a work of art, I love the interior and the style of the car.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Beautiful Quotes , Art Quotes
- I like my parents but they are just not good parents. They are nice enough people. I'm not interested in hurting their feelings.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Hurt Quotes , Nice Quotes
- My mom was on welfare and the occasional food stamp, but I have never participated in any of those governmental programs, even the ones that kind of work like education, scholarships and whatever, and I managed to do just fine.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Mom Quotes , Kind Quotes
- That's the thing I love about sports: sports force you to quit. You can't pursue your dream till you're 46. When it comes to acting, writing, comedy, nobody ever stops you.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sports Quotes , Dream Quotes
- The thing about a good podcast is you have to have a good host. If you don't have a compelling host then you have nothing.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Host Quotes , Compelling Quotes
- A lot of guys and people in our society think that chicks just love dudes with money. Chicks love dudes who are successful who happen to have money - do you know what I mean? Chicks are attracted to dudes that are doing their own thing.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Mean Quotes , Successful Quotes
- I don't like those men who claim that their wife is their best friend. . . . I think spouses should tolerate each other and occasionally have sex.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Sex Quotes , Men Quotes
- Honestly, I've always had difficulty relaxing, unwinding and going to bed - that kind of stuff.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Bed Quotes , Stuff Quotes
- Lets not focus on saving a nickel... lets focus on making a buck.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Focus Quotes , Saving Quotes
- Everyone keeps saying, "Oh my God, oh my God, how intimidating." It's like saying, "How could you date Jennifer Aniston after she's been with Brad Pitt?" I don't care.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- I saw a commercial for the maxi pads for the bigger gals they're making now. That was a nice visual while I was eating.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Nice Quotes
- When Asian people grow up fast they go to college at 13. White people grow up fast it's about fudge packing and triple D's at 13.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Growing Up Quotes
- I've always boxed, I always taught boxing.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Boxing Quotes
- I give women two types of orgasms. Fake and none.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- He doesn't sound like a guy who's done a onesome, let alone a threesome.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes
- When I'm in power, here's how I'm gonna put the country back on its feet. I'm going to put sterilizing agents in the following products: Sunny Delight, Mountain Dew, and Thick-Crust Pizza. Only the 'tardiest of the 'tards like the thick crust.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Country Quotes , Feet Quotes
- California is like the hot blond high school chick who's been getting by on her looks, but now she's 45 and falling apart.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Fall Quotes , School Quotes
- My life is about building and working and wrenching on some cars.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Car Quotes , Life Is Quotes
- If in 1989 I said, 'I have an idea: Bottle water and sell it. And charge more than a beer,' they would have chased me around with a giant butterfly net. The same with paying to watch a television station.
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Tags : Adam Carolla Quotes , Butterfly Quotes , Beer Quotes