Mark Twain Quotes, Fire Quotes, Order Quotes

When your watch gets out of order you have choice of two things to do: throw it in the fire or take it to the watch-tinker. The former is the quickest.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Fire Quotes , Order Quotes

Your friends may love you in private but your enemies will hate you in public.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Hate Quotes , Love You Quotes

Of all God's creatures, there is only one that cannot be made slave of the leash. That one is the cat. If man could be crossed with the cat it would improve the man, but it would deteriorate the cat.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

A brown spotted lady-bug climbed the dizzy height of a grass blade, and Tom bent down close to it and said, "Lady-bug, lady-bug, fly away home, your house is on fire, your children's alone," and she took wing and went off to see about it -- which did not surprise the boy, for he knew of old that this insect was credulous about conflagrations, and he had practised upon its simplicity more than once.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Children Quotes , Home Quotes

Warm summer sun, shine kindly here. Warm southern wind, blow softly here. Green sod above, lie light, lie light. Good night, dear Heart, Good night, good night.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Romantic Quotes , Good Night Quotes

Remember this, take this to heart, live by it, die for it if necessary: that our patriotism is medieval, outworn, obsolete; that the modern patriotism, the true patriotism, the only rational patriotism, is loyalty to the Nation ALL the time, loyalty to the Government when it deserves it.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Loyalty Quotes , Heart Quotes

Half of the results of a good intentions are evil; half the results of an evil intention are good.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Evil Quotes , Half Quotes

There is nothing more frustrating than a good example.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Example Quotes , Frustrating Quotes

It takes some little time to accept and realize the fact that while you have been growing old, your friends have not been standing still, in that matter.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Growing Quotes , Littles Quotes

You thunder and lightning too much; the reader ceases to get under the bed, by and by.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Writing Quotes , Bed Quotes

A man's first duty is to his own conscience and honor; the party and country come second to that, and never first.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Country Quotes , Party Quotes

When in doubt tell the truth.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Truth Quotes

Figures don't lie, but liars figure.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Liars Quotes , Lying Quotes

The choir always tittered and whispered all through the service. There was once a church choir that was not ill-bred, but I have forgotten where it was.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Church Choir Quotes , Atheism Quotes

We have the best government that money can buy.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

I've lived through some terrible things in my life, some of which actually happened.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

Have a place for everything and keep the thing somewhere else. This is not advice, it is merely custom.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes , Somewhere Else Quotes

Well enough for old folks to rise early, because they have done so many mean things all their lives they can't sleep anyhow.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mean Quotes , Sleep Quotes

Truth is more of a stranger than fiction.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Truth Quotes , Fiction Quotes

We like to read about rich people in the newspapers; the papers know it, and they do their best to keep this appetite liberally fed.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , People Quotes , Paper Quotes