Mark Twain Quotes, Eight Quotes, Wife Quotes

The Koran does not permit Mohammedans to drink. Their natural instincts do not permit them to be moral. They say the Sultan has eight hundred wives. This almost amounts to bigamy.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Eight Quotes , Wife Quotes

What a man misses mostly in heaven is company.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Clever Quotes

A half-truth is the most cowardly of lies.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Lying Quotes , Half Quotes

The human being places sexual intercourse above all other joys, but leaves it out of his heaven.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Joy Quotes , Heaven Quotes

I cannot see how a man of any large degree of humorous perception can ever be religious -- unless he purposely shut the eyes of his mind & keep them shut by force.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Humorous Quotes

To be satisfied with what one has; that is wealth. As long as one sorely needs a certain additional amount, that man isn't rich.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Long Quotes

A man who keeps company with glaciers comes to feel tolerably insignificant by and by.

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I bring you this stately matron named Christendom, returning bedraggled, besmirched, and dishonored from pirate raids in Kiao-Chow, Manchuria, South Africa, and the Phillipines, with her soul full of meanness, her pocket full of boodle, and her mouth full of pious hypocrisies. Give her soap and a towel, but hide the looking-glass.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Glasses Quotes , Hypocrisy Quotes

Learn from the mistakes of others - you won't live long enough to make them all yourself. He's opposed to millionaires, but it would be dangerous to offer him the position.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mistake Quotes , Long Quotes

I have never seen what to me seemed an atom of proof that there is a future life. And yet-I am inclined to expect one.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Atoms Quotes

You see, he knew his own laws just as other people so often know the laws: by words, not by effects. They take a meaning, and get to be very vivid, when you come to apply them to yourself.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Law Quotes , People Quotes

If the bubble reputation can be obtained only at the cannon's mouth, I am willing to go there for it, provided the cannon is empty.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mouths Quotes , Reputation Quotes

Inherited ideas are a curious thing, and interesting to observe and examine.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ideas Quotes , Interesting Quotes

Dying man couldn't make up his mind which place to go to-both have their advantages, heaven for the climate, hell for the company!

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Religious Quotes , Men Quotes

Adam was but human—this explains it all. He did not want the apple for the apple's sake, he wanted it only because it was forbidden. The mistake was in not forbidding the serpent; then he would have eaten the serpent.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Mistake Quotes , Apples Quotes

I can understand German as well as the maniac that invented it, but I talk it best through an interpreter.

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My interest in my work dies a sudden and violent death when the work is done.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Done Quotes , Violent Quotes

It isn't safe to sit in judgment upon another person's illusion when you are not on the inside. While you are thinking it is a dream, he may be knowing it is a planet.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dream Quotes , Thinking Quotes

The human race consists of the damned and the ought-to-be damned.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Race Quotes , Humans Quotes

I'm merely running some errands. This is now off the record.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Running Quotes , Records Quotes