Mark Twain Quotes, Jobs Quotes, Men Quotes

When a humorist ventures upon the grave concerns of life he must do his job better than another man or he works harm to his cause.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Jobs Quotes , Men Quotes

He [George Washington Cable] has taught me to abhor and detest the Sabbath day and hunt up new and troublesome ways to dishonor it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Way Quotes , Taught Quotes

Rise early. It is the early bird that catches the worm. Don't be fooled by this absurd law; I once knew a man who tried it. He got up at sunrise and a horse bit him.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Horse Quotes , Men Quotes

Be virtuous and you will be eccentric.

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Do your duty today and repent tomorrow.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Advice Quotes , Today Quotes

I have achieved my seventy years in the usual way: by sticking strictly to a scheme of life which would kill anybody else... I will offer here, as a sound maxim, this: That we can't reach old age by another man's road.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Birthday Quotes , Men Quotes

Damn the subjunctive. It brings all our writers to shame.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Shame Quotes , Grammar Quotes

There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Money Quotes

When a man stands on the verge of seventy-two you know perfectly well that he never reached that place without knowing what this life is - heartbreaking bereavement.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Men Quotes , Two Quotes

We are chameleons, and our partialities and prejudices change place with an easy and blesses facility, and we are soon wonted to the change and happy in it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Change Quotes , Prejudice Quotes

Substitute "damn" every time you're inclined to write "very"; your editor will delete it and the writing will be just as it should be.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

I can teach anybody how to get, what they want out of life. The problem is that I can't find anybody who can tell me what they want. Once you are crystal clear about the intended end result that you seek to produce, all the ways that it can become a done deal start to reveal themselves to you. There are many who have accomplished exactly what you want to achieve and could show you the way. You are not ready to ask them because you are not clear and you have not determined which questions need answers.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Life Quotes , Answers Quotes

We can achieve what we can conceive and believe.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes

Wit is the sudden marriage of ideas which before their union were not perceived to have any relation.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Ideas Quotes , Literature Quotes

Familiarity breeds contempt. How accurate that is. The reason we hold truth in such respect is because we have so little opportunity to get familiar with it.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Respect Quotes

Wit and Humor - if any difference, it is in duration - lightning and electric light. Same material, apparently; but one is vivid, and can do damage - the other fools along and enjoys elaboration.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Differences Quotes , Light Quotes

A man cannot be comfortable without his own approval.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Confidence Quotes , Good Life Quotes

I have not professionally dealt in truth. Many when they come to die have spent all the truth that was in them, and enter the next world as paupers. I have saved up enough to make an astonishment there.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Truth Quotes

Damn these human beings; if I had invented them I would go hide my head in a bag.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Bags Quotes , Damn Quotes

But it is a blessed provision of nature that at times like these, as soon as a man's mercury has got down to a certain point there comes a revulsion, and he rallies. Hope springs up, and cheerfulness along with it, and then he is in good shape to do something for himself, if anything can be done.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Cheer Quotes , Spring Quotes