Mark Twain Quotes, Father Quotes, Science Quotes

When I was fourteen years old, I was amazed at how unintelligent my father was. By the time I turned twenty-one, I was astounded how much he had learned in the last seven years.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Father Quotes , Science Quotes

Virtue has never been as respectable as money.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Money Quotes , Virtue Quotes

He has been a doctor a year now and has had two patients - no, three, I think - yes, it was three; I attended their funerals.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I have been reading the morning paper. I do it every morning-knowing well that I shall find in it the usual depravities and basenesses and hypocrisies and cruelties that make up civilization, and cause me to put in the rest of the day pleading for the damnation of the human race. I cannot seem to get my prayers answered, yet I do not despair.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Morning Quotes , Prayer Quotes

Medicine has made all its progress during the past fifty years. ... How many operations that are now in use were known fifty years ago?-they were not operations, they were executions.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Science Quotes , Past Quotes

The principle of give and take is the principle of diplomacy - give one and take ten

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

There are two times in a man's life when he should not speculate: when he can't afford it, and when he can.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Life Quotes , Money Quotes

Whenever he was out of luck and a little down-hearted, he would fall to mourning over the loss of a wonderful cat he used to own (for where women and children are not, men of kindly impulses take up with pets, for they must love something)

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Children Quotes , Fall Quotes

And so I am become a knight of the Kingdom of Dreams and Shadows

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Dream Quotes , Knights Quotes

The average American may not know who his grandfather was. But the American was, however, one degree better off than the average Frenchman who, as a rule, was in considerable doubt as to who his father was.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Father Quotes

Which is him?" The grammar was faulty, maybe, but we could not know, then, that it would go in a book someday.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Book Quotes , Someday Quotes

No one can tell me what is a good cigar - for me. I am the only judge. People who claim to know say that I smoke the worst cigars in the world. They bring their own cigars when they come to my house.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Judging Quotes , People Quotes

Pessimism is only the name that men of weak nerve give to wisdom.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Wisdom Quotes , Men Quotes

A religion that comes of thought, and study, and deliberate conviction, sticks best. The revivalized convert who is scared in the direction of heaven because he sees hell yawn suddenly behind him, not only regains confidence when his scare is over, but is ashamed of himself for being scared, and often becomes more hopelessly and malignantly wicked than he was before.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Faith Quotes , Confidence Quotes

Jim said that bees won't sting idiots, but I didn't believe that, because I tried them lots of times myself and they wouldn't sting me.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Believe Quotes , Literature Quotes

I wish I could make him understand that a loving good heart is riches enough, and that without it intellect is poverty.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Heart Quotes , Wish Quotes

The higher animals get their teeth without pain or inconvenience. Man gets his through months and months of cruel torture; he will never get a set which can really be depended on 'till a dentist makes him one.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Pain Quotes , Animal Quotes

I cannot call to mind a single instance where I have ever been irreverent, except toward the things which were sacred to other people.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , People Quotes , Mind Quotes

God pours out love upon all with a lavish hand -- but He reserves vengeance for His very own.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , God Quotes , Hands Quotes

Diligence is a good thing, but taking things easy is much more restful.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Humor Quotes , Easy Quotes