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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- Divorce: a resumption of diplomatic relations and rectification of boundaries.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Divorce Quotes , Diplomatic Relations Quotes
- Hippogriff, n. An animal (now extinct) which was half horse and half griffin. The griffin was itself a compound creature, half lion and half eagle. The hippogriff was actually, therefore, only one-quarter eagle, which is two dollars and fifty cents in gold. The study of zoology is full of surprises.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Horse Quotes , Animal Quotes
- CENTAUR, n. One of a race of persons who lived before the division of labor had been carried to such a pitch of differentiation, and who followed the primitive economic maxim, "Every man his own horse."
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- Patience, n. A minor form of dispair, disguised as a virtue.
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- Behavior, n. Conduct, as determined, not by principle, but by breeding.
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- Empty wine bottles have a bad opinion of women.
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- GEOGRAPHER, n. A chap who can tell you offhand the difference between the outside of the world and the inside.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Differences Quotes , World Quotes
- A lottery is a tax on stupidity.
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- Epitaph: An inscription on a tomb showing that virtues acquired by death have a retroactive effect.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Death Quotes , Dying Quotes
- FORCE, n. "Force is but might," the teacher said p/ "That definition's just."/ The boy said naught but throught instead,/ Remembering his pounded head:/ "Force is not might but must!"
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Teacher Quotes , Boys Quotes
- PROVIDENTIAL, adj. Unexpectedly and conspicuously beneficial to the person so describing it.
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- To be comic is merely to be playful, but wit is a serious matter. To laugh at it is to confess that you do not understand.
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- ORTHOGRAPHY, n. The science of spelling by the eye instead of the ear.
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- DUEL, n. A formal ceremony preliminary to reconciliation of two enemies. Great skill is necessary to its satisfactory observance; if awkwardly performed . . . deplorable consequences sometimes ensue. A long time ago a man lost his life.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Life Quotes , Time Quotes
- Bigamy, n. A mistake in taste for which the wisdom of the future will adjudge a punishment called trigamy.
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- A man is known by the company he organizes.
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- Slang is the speech of him who robs the literary garbage carts on their way to the dumps.
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- Self-restraint is indulgence of the propensity to forgo.
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- To renounce an honor for an advantage. To renounce an advantage for a greater advantage.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Honor Quotes , Advantage Quotes
- CLERGYMAN, n. A man who undertakes the management of our spiritual affairs as a method of better his temporal ones.
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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Spiritual Quotes , Men Quotes