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Ambrose Bierce Quotes
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Ambrose Bierce Quotes 976
- MUSTANG, n. An indocile horse of the western plains. In English society, the American wife of an English nobleman.
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- Beauty, n: the power by which a woman charms a lover and terrifies a husband.
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- All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusions is called a philosopher.
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- PRE-ADAMITE, n. One of an experimental and apparently unsatisfactory race of antedated Creation. . . . Little its known of them beyond the fact that they supplied Cain with a wife and theologians with a controversy.
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- Architect. One who drafts a plan of your house, and plans a draft of your money.
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- What is a democrat? One who believes that the republicans have ruined the country. What is a republican? One who believes that the democrats would ruin the country.
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- PIE, n. An advance agent of the reaper whose name is Indigestion.
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- Wisdom is known only by contrasting it with folly; by shadow only we perceive that all visible objects are not flat. Yet Philanthropos would abolish evil!
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- Vote: the instrument and symbol of a freeman's power to make a fool of himself and a wreck of his country.
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- Doubt is the father of invention.
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- TARIFF, n. A scale of taxes on imports, designed to protect the domestic producer against the greed of his consumer.
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- DECALOGUE, n. A series of commandments, ten in number - just enough to permit an intelligent selection for observance, but not enough to embarrass the choice.
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- A single swallow, it is said, devours ten millions of insects every year. The supplying of these insects I take to be a signal instance of the Creator's bounty in providing for the lives of His creatures.
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- Indigestion: A disease which the patient and his friends frequently mistake for deep religious conviction and concern for the salvation of mankind. As the simple Red Man of the Western Wild put it, with, it must be confessed, a certain force: 'Plenty well, no pray; big belly ache, heap God.'
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- Photograph: a picture painted by the sun without instruction in art.
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- There are four kinds of Homicide: felonious, excusable, justifiable, and praiseworthy.
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- Patriotism: The first resort of a scoundrel.
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- MESMERISM, n. Hypnotism before it wore good clothes, kept a carriage and asked Incredulity to dinner.
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- The furrier gets the skins of more foxes than asses.
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- FIB, n. A lie that has not cut its teeth. An habitual liar's nearest approach to truth: the perigee of his eccentric orbit.
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