पत्नी (पति से)- अजी, यह जो आप पैंट बार-बार ऊपर खींचते हो, वह बहुत बुरा लगता है।
पति (पत्नी से)- मेरा खयाल है अगर मैं पैंट ऊपर न खींचूं तो और भी बुरा लगेगा।
Kitna Bebus Hai Insaan Qismat Ke Aage,
Har Sapna Toot Jata Hai Hakikat Ke Aage,
Jish Ne KaBi Jukna Nahi Sikha Duniya Me,
Wo Bhi Juk Jata Hai Begum Ke Aage.
KaAliyan bariyan we paper nu me laawa,
Speed me 220 di likhaan,
Teacher de saamne me nai rukda,
Em a night writer,
Rem0vAan maAr mar paper nu chehk kad da,
Sarey bchey takde we ki hogaya,
Lagda we aj mera paper hogaya,
Un nu me puchda,
Ni paper sada le ja ni jattiye,
Ni dur isey le ja we ariye,
Ni teacher tu meri, meri, Mein tera student dent.
एक दिन एक भिखारी कंजूस ताऊ को
मिल गया.!!
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भिखारी (ताऊ से) : पचास पैसे दे दो
भैया, मैंने तीन दिन से खाना नहीं
खाया है.!!
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ताऊ : दस रुपए दूंगा लेकिन पहले ये
बता कि पचास पैसे में खाना कहां
मिलता है.!!
Wo ishq To Karti Hai Par Janun Nahi Karti,
Wo Katal To Karti Hai Par Khun Nahi Karti,
is Kadar Kanjus Hai Meri Chahne Wali,
Miss Call To Karti Hai Par Call Nahi Karti.
Girl:ab hum dono bohet badnam ho chukey hain ab hamin shadi kar laini chahiye
pathan:lekin itni badnami k bad hum dono sey shadi kon karega?
(geo khan)
Judge: tumhe bai- ijjat bari kiya jata h.
kyunki jo scooter churane ka aarop tum par lagaya tha
use koi sach sabit nahi kar paya.
chor: kush hokar. Iska matlab h ab ye scooter mera ho gaya.
Seth Bansi Lal Bhimar The Or Marne Ke Najdeek The
Wahi Unka Driver Retire Fauji Driver Bhi Tha Or Unke Dost Bhi.
Seth : Accha Ab Mera Chalne Ka Waqt Ho Gaya Hai.
Driver Fauji : To Ji Mein Gaadi Nikal Lu Kuch Door Chod Dunga.
When Sunny Leone came to Comedy Nights with Kapil.
A guy from the Audience says:
Ji main aapka bahut bada fan hun.
Maine aapki Saari hollywood and bollywood movies dekhi hain.
Aapke saath aapki movie ka ek step karna chahta hoon!!
Yeh baat sunkar
siddhu says:
Guru,
Har Peela fruit aam nhi hota,
Glass me mut ke piyo to vo jam nhi hota,
Har seeta ka pati raam nhi hota,
Thodi jeb dhili karo or uthao hotel ka kharcha,
Kyunki ye vo step hai jo khulle aam nhi hota!
Master: Tumne
HomeworkNahi Kiya,
Bolo Kya
Saza Du?
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Papu: Woh Last seat
ki ladki ne bhi Nahi
Kiya,
Hum Dono ko ,
Bathroom Me Band
Kar do.�>=)
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Papu rox............!!
Milan
Great Confusion: Jawahrlal Nehru said "LAZINESS IS YOUR BIGGEST ENEMY"
Mahatma Gandhi said "ALWAYS LOVE YOUR ENEMY" Ab batao bapu ki sune ya chachu ki??.
Har Ladki Ke Chehre Par Naqab Hota Hai,
Naqab Aashiq Ke Lye Azab Hota Hai,
Mat Marna Naqb Wali Ladki Par Dost,
Kyuki Khubsurat Packing Me Maal Aksr Khrab Hota Hai.