Charles Dickens Quotes, Funny Quotes, Humorous Quotes

Poetry's unnat'ral; no man ever talked poetry 'cept a beadle on boxin' day, or Warren's blackin' or Rowland's oil, or some o' them low fellows; never you let yourself down to talk poetry, my boy.

5 years ago

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

He said he didn't very well understand how George was going to sleep any more than he did now, seeing that there were only twenty-four hours in each day.

5 years ago

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Time Quotes

Let us swear while we may, for in heaven it will not be allowed

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

You can always count on Americans to do the right thing - after they've tried everything else.

5 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sarcastic Quotes

I know what I believe. I will continue to articulate what I believe and what I believe - I believe what I believe is right.

5 years ago

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Tags : George W. Bush Quotes , Funny Quotes , Stupid Quotes

No man knows he is young while he is young.

5 years ago

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Tags : Gilbert K. Chesterton Quotes , Funny Quotes , Witty Quotes

Auto racing, bull fighting, and mountain climbing are the only real sports... all the others are games.

5 years ago

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Tags : Ernest Hemingway Quotes , Funny Quotes , Sports Quotes

One should always be in love. That is the reason one should never marry.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

Ones real life is often the life that one does not lead.

5 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Trust Quotes

Fifteen referees. I want fifteen referees to be at this fight because there ain't no one man who can keep up with the pace I'm gonna set except me. There's not a man alive who can whup me. I'm too fast. I'm too smart. I'm too pretty. I should be a postage stamp. That's the only way I'll ever get licked.

5 years ago

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Tags : Muhammad Ali Quotes , Funny Quotes , Smart Quotes

The report of my death was an exaggeration.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Death Quotes

I drew the duck blue because I've never seen a blue duck before and, to be honest with you I wanted to see a blue duck.

6 years ago

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Tags : Adam Sandler Quotes , Funny Quotes , Blue Quotes

Let us live so that when we come to die even the undertaker will be sorry.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

He has been a doctor a year now and has had two patients - no, three, I think - yes, it was three; I attended their funerals.

6 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

My best training came from my father.

5 years ago

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Tags : Woodrow Wilson Quotes , Funny Quotes , Dad Quotes

Not to have control over the senses is like sailing in a rudderless ship, bound to break to pieces on coming in contact with the very first rock.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mahatma Gandhi Quotes , Inspirational Quotes , Funny Quotes

If I had only known, I would have been a locksmith.

5 years ago

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Tags : Albert Einstein Quotes , Funny Quotes , Business Quotes

You can always rely on America to do the right thing -- once it has exhausted the alternatives.

5 years ago

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

One accusation you can't throw at me is that I've always done my best.

6 years ago

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Tags : Alan Shearer Quotes , Funny Quotes , Soccer Quotes

I'm so fast that last night I turned off the light switch in my hotel room and was in bed before the room was dark.

5 years ago

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Tags : Muhammad Ali Quotes , Funny Quotes , Motivational Quotes