Mom to her 7 year old kid
lets practice maths ok?
lets start with addition.
Example
Your GF gave u 2 candy and 2 ice cream
Whats ur answer?
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Boy: Love u Jaanu. ;)
Santa : Aap Gaye ( Cow ) Ka Dudh Use Karte H.?
Banta: Ji Nahi, Wo To Patla Hota H.
Santa: Phir Bhais (Buffalo) Ka.?
Banta: Ji Nahi Wo To Gada Hota H.
Santa: Phir Bakri Ka.?
Banta: Ji Nahi, Wo To Pani Jaisa Hota H.
Santa: Phir Dibbe Ka ?
Banta: Nahi Sahab Mein Dibba To Bilkul Pasand Nahi Karta.
Santa: Phir ?
Banta: Mein Delhi Dugd Yojna Ka Dudh Istemaal Karta Hu.
Usme Saari Kubhiya Ek Sath Hoti H.
Ek time meri Girlfriend ne mujhe apne ghar bulaya,Mai ghar pahucha aur bell bajai,Uski choti sister ne darwaza khola,Wo bahut sundar thi,Muskura k boli aap bahut smart ho,Abhi ghar par koi nahi hai.Mai akeli hu, Mai muskuraya aur,Apni bike ki taraf wapas jane laga,To uski puri family ghar se bahar aa gayi aur,Meri sharafat ki tareef karte huey,Mujhe gale lagaya aur kaha,Hum ko rishta manzur h.Ab mai kya batau...??..Ki Mai to bike ko lock karne gaya tha.~navi
Ek bacha boy girl ko kiss karte hue dekh leta hai.
Bacha: mujhe bhi karne do Warna main apke papa ko bata dunga.
Ladki: Le yaar tu bhi karle,
Bacha kafi try karta hai,
Par wo height me kam reh jata hai,
Baccha pareshan ho kar.
“Bhaad mein gayi duniyadari”
Jo kam galat hai.. Wo galat hai.. Main to bataunga!!
Husband: Agar operation ke dauran mujhe kuch ho jaye, to usi doctor se shadi kar lena.
Biwi: Aisa kyun keh rahe ho?
Husband: To kya doctor ko maaf kar du....?
Teacher- How Many Planets Are There?
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Santa- Mercury,Venus,Jupiter Vagerah Vagerah
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Teacher-Aur Batao?
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Santa-Aur Bas..Sab Badhiya!!
Maata Rani Ki Kripa
Ap Sunao???
Arz Hai..
Kapde Silvane Ho To Dhund Lo Darji..
Wah Wah..
Ershad-Ershad..
Ki Kapde Silvane Ho To Dhund Lo Darji..
aur
Nangu pungu Ghumna Ho To, Aapki Marji!
Ek Shahab Har Roj Ek Restra Mein Chai Peete The,
Lekin Waiter Ko Tip Diye Baigar Hi Chale Jate The,
Ek Din Chaiye Peene Ke Baad Unhone Waiter Ko Bulaya
Aur 50 Rupee Ka Note Dete Hue Bole- Aaj Se Tumhe Har Roj Tip Mila Kareghi.
Waiter: Thanku Sir. Kal Se Aapko Bhi Juthi Chaiye Nahi Mileghi.
Mat Puchh sMs Ki Inteha Kaha Tak Hai,
Tu Karle Kanjusi Teri Takat Jaha Tak Hai,
sMs Ki Umid Nahi Hai Tujh Se Aey Dost,
Hume To Dekhna Hai
Tu Kanjus Kaha Tak Hai.
Ramu Ne Daru Pike Apne Apko Aaine Me Dekha…. ~ Or ~ ~ Bola ~ Yaara Isko To Kahi Dekha H O Yaad Aaya Ye To Wahi Kamina H….. Jo Shadi K Album Me Teri Bivi K Sath Tha.????????