Oscar Wilde Quotes, Funny Quotes, Happy Birthday Quotes

The old believe everything, the middle-aged suspect everything, the young know everything.

4 years ago

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Happy Birthday Quotes

I have lost friends, some by death...others by sheer inability to cross the street.

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Tags : Virginia Woolf Quotes , Funny Quotes , Friendship Quotes

I do not hold that we should rearm in order to fight. I hold that we should rearm in order to parley.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

I woke up my pop in the middle of the night 'cause the boogie man's under my bed. My pop is this big, huge man, nothing can hurt him. I went running into his bedroom like, 'Daddy, Daddy, the boogie man's under the bed!' Pop opens one eye, he's like, 'Is the boogie man bigger than me?' 'Well, no Daddy, he's not.' 'Well, you got your choice: you can deal with the boogie man or you can deal with me.'

5 years ago

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Running Quotes

Marriage, n: the state or condition of a community consisting of a master, a mistress, and two slaves, making in all, two.

4 years ago

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Tags : Ambrose Bierce Quotes , Funny Quotes , Anniversary Quotes

There are a terrible lot of lies going about the world, and the worst of it is that half of them are true.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , True Friend Quotes

The difference between screwing around and science is writing it down.

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Tags : Adam Savage Quotes , Funny Quotes , Writing Quotes

Man is an animal that makes bargains: no other animal does this - no dog exchanges bones with another.

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Tags : Adam Smith Quotes , Funny Quotes , Dog Quotes

By appreciation, we make excellence in others our own property.

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Tags : Voltaire Quotes , Funny Quotes , Appreciation Quotes

In the majority of cases, conscience is an elastic and very flexible article

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Tags : Charles Dickens Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humorous Quotes

A woman is always buying something.

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Tags : Ovid Quotes , Funny Quotes , Buying Something Quotes

There is nothing so annoying as to have two people talking when you're busy interrupting.

5 years ago

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Hilarious Quotes

Don't talk to me about naval tradition. It's nothing but rum, sodomy, and the lash.

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Tags : Winston Churchill Quotes , Funny Quotes , Army Quotes

I would have written a shorter letter, but I did not have the time.

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Tags : Mark Twain Quotes , Funny Quotes , Time Quotes

Women are made to be loved, not understood.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

A dog reflects the family life. Whoever saw a frisky dog in a gloomy family, or a sad dog in a happy one? Snarling people have snarling dogs, dangerous people have dangerous ones.

4 years ago

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Tags : Arthur Conan Doyle Quotes , Funny Quotes , Family Quotes

If one tells the truth, one is sure, sooner or later, to be found out.

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Tags : Oscar Wilde Quotes , Funny Quotes , Truth Quotes

If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love. Don't be surly at home, then go out in the street and start grinning 'Good morning' at total strangers.

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Tags : Maya Angelou Quotes , Love Quotes , Funny Quotes

I am a Catholic. Basically, the Catholic religion is 'If it feels good - stop.'

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Tags : Adam Ferrara Quotes , Funny Quotes , Humor Quotes

I don't mind what Congress does, as long as they don't do it in the streets and frighten the horses.

4 years ago

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Tags : Victor Hugo Quotes , Funny Quotes , Horse Quotes